Admit Defeat (TMR fic 2)

Chapter 42

(this song definitely doesn't fit beyond the title being about fire, but I couldn't care less~) 

"Minho," I say, watching a bird hop along the ledge of a roof self-importantly.

"Definitely." Newt squints at the flock of crows. "That one looks annoyed, so you know what that means."

"Mr. Alby Alberton it is," I agree.

Newt snorts. "Alby Alberton?"

"Well, it's as much of a last name as any of us have."

"Fair enough." Newt tangles his arms and legs around me again, octopus-style like normal. It's hot on the roof, but I don't have the heart to push him away when we only have one day together. "Except for Teresa. She has a last name. Agnes."

I nod a bit. "We probably all have last names, we just don't know them. My name is technically Ashley."

He jolts a bit. "Really? Wait, how do you know that?"

"I got a memory back about WICKED. At least... I assume it was WICKED. I went to school there, I guess. The woman called me Ashley. It's their name for me, not my real name, but it's something."

"It is something," he says, his voice soft. Is it longing, a wish to know his own past and name, or just the gentleness he uses when he's afraid the people around him are hurting?

"Newt?" I ask, slightly nervous although I'm not sure why. I don't normally talk to him about sensitive subjects, so the most I've learned about him was when I read his journal without permission.

He raises an eyebrow, and I continue. "Why are you so... careful? It's like you couldn't bear to hurt someone's feelings or push them when they're doing badly."

"Because..." He pauses for a moment, thoughtful. "I know how much it hurts to be broken. I don't want to break others or make it worse if they are suffering."

I nod a little, closing my eyes. I fall into a half-sleeping state, and I don't bother to respond when I hear him softly whisper, as if he's experimenting with the feel of the word on his tongue:

"Ashley."