Our Arms Intertwined (Kellic)

Chapter Ten

« Vic's POV »
I rushed down the hall to the door leading into the garden outside. Our group had pretty much decided that the garden was out meeting place.

I pushed the heavy door open and walked over to the bench I saw Kellin, Jack, Alex and Justin near. Jack and Alex were holding hands; as they often did, now that they came out to us, but they still had to be careful of the staff seeing. Kellin and Justin were in some kind of argument about something, non-doubtingly, stupid. And I didn't think about it too much until they started getting physical.

Kellin shoved Justin's shoulder playfully, and Justin pushed Kellin down. I knew that Justin was straight and didn't mean anything, but I could still feel the wretched feeling of jealousy rising in me as they continued bumping into each other. I really hated being jealous, so I was glad when Kellin noticed me walking over to the group.

"Oh, hey Vic." Kellin smiled and looked down, trying to hide an obvious blush.

" 'Sup dude." Justin greeted me with a nod of the head.

"Hey man." Jack and Alex both said at the same time, them giggled like little girls when they realized that they sounded like an old couple. They were honestly my relationship goals... if I had a relationship. 

"Hey guys." I said with as much confidence as I could muster. I really thought of myself as the leader of our group-thingy, so of course I wanted to sound as MANLY as I could!

Oh who am I kidding? I'm a queer, little Mexican boy, I am nothing near a leader.

I took a seat in between Kellin and Justin on the floor with Jack and Alex in front of us on the bench. I basically just purposely sat in between Kellin and Justin. Totally normal, right? Lolno.

"So, how'd your date with Gerard go?" Alex asked playfully.

"Oh, shut up, we all know he's into Dr. Iero." I laughed.

"Yeah, plus Dr. Gerard is like eight years older than all of us." Kellin backed me up.

"Exactly. I think that's like... illegal, considering I'm seventeen." I said.

"Haha, you got me. You guys win." Alex gave in. considering his point wasn't even a real point.

"I'm gonna go get some water." Jack said softly, looking to Alex, obviously wanting him to go with.

"I'll go too." Alex stood up from the bench as he spoke.

"I also need a drink." Justin got up and started walking with Alex and Jack like a mom watching them, leaving me and Kellin alone.

"Alright, wanna tell me what's going on?" Kellin asked me almost as soon as Jack, Justin and Alex were out of sight. Now that I had finished talking to Gerard on the matter, I felt fine with telling Kellin exactly what happened with my panic-attack thingy.

"I guess, but could we like... go somewhere not as crowded?" I wanted to make sure there was the smallest amount of humans around us that could hear the conversation. Ew. Humans.

'Sure." He said knowingly.

I pulled him up from his seated position, after I too had stood up. I searched around for places to sit, until I found the perfect spot; a willow tree standing alone, and it was fairly empty. I guess Kellin had seen where I had because he started walking over to the tree, dragging me along.

God, Kellin. He's so perfect. In every way I could think of him, all I could come up with was perfect: that smile, his hair, his beautiful blue eyes and the way they reflected the sun with such a beautiful shine, is laugh, his hands, the way he pulled me to the tree, the way he walked, his lips, his butt, him.

Fuck. Did I just-? I just thought to myself of how perfect Kellin's but is. I'm so done with myself, oh my God.

Aren't we all though? I mean, we're forced to always be around our self, we can't just tel our self to just go away for a second. We're stuck with just our self. We can't escape it. We can't just tell our self to go die. 

Well, most people don't; I do. If I could just escape myself for a day, if I could just drown m demons for a day, if I could just forget the world for a day. Oh if only. If that'd happen, I'd surely be king for a day.

"That was beautiful." Kellin stated. Fuck. Did I just say all of that out loud?

"Wait, where did I start?" I asked Kellin, trying to sound as normal as I could manage. Saying things out loud when unintended is not normal.

"Oh, just about how you're so over yourself." Oh thank God. I just missed the Kellin's great ass shit.

"Oh, yeah"

"Y'know, you're not the only one who tells them self to die."

"Yeah, but I'm sure I'm the only person you know who jsut lets words escape my mouth as if it were an open bottle." I laughed, despising my lack of mouth filter.

Kellin chuckled with me, then sat down under the shaded tree, pulling me down too.

"So, what happened?" Kellin asked me gently.

"Well I don't really have any way to drag this out any longer, so... I was being taken through the 'Violence Unit' with my nurse, and the entire atmosphere was just really weird and uncomfortable and I honesty hated it and I started, like literally, freaking out and I guess it was an 'anxiety/panic attack', and... yeah." I said vaguely, not wanting much detail.

"Oh, okay." Kellin left it at that with a comfortable silence.

For a split second the thought of telling him my feelings rose in my stomach, but I quickly put that down. I couldn't do that. He doesn't like me too, why would he? I'm just some depressed fucktard. No one wants me in that way. I can't be loved. I'm honestly unlovable; I mean, not even I love myself.

I looked to Kellin, and he looked at me. His blue eyes were so perfect. His pale skin is so perfect. His black hair is so perfect. He is so perfect. I just want him to be mine, why can't he just be mine? I looked down at his hand, tempted to grab it.

Hold his hand.

I did.

He doesn't seem to mind. His eyes the color of crystals looked directly into mine. I could kiss him right now. I should kiss him right now.

Kiss him. Kiss him right now.

I leaned in towards Kellin and as I saw him shut his eyes, I let mine flutter closed. My first kiss was about to happen. I'm seventeen and I'm just now about to have my first kiss. Pathetic. 

But that doesn't matter right now. All that matters is our lips. Our lips connected so softly; his so smooth and perfect. Just as I had imagined. His lips molded perfectly to mine as he kissed me back under the willow tree that blocked out all outside eyes. Kellin was so perfect. Kellin is so perfect.

I lifted my eyes back open and pulled back, not expecting Kellin to grab me and pull me back in to kiss me another time. He bit my bottom lip softly, then gently kissed it, as if he were putting a band-aid on it. I kissed him back with so much excitement I thought I might burst. We sat there for a few minutes, kissing each other before he pulled back again. I opened my eyes once again, to be met with his.

"I've been waiting to do that for so long now." Kellin said shyly and looked down at our hands as he interlocked our fingers.

*****

HAHA FINALLY SOME KELLIC. I updated an hour late, bUT HEY THIS IS MY PRESENT TO YOU GUYS BC OF MY BAD SCHEDULE. I hope you enjoyed. 

Oh! And I feel like you guys don't comment at all, and if it's because you're shy, don't be. Idk why you'd be shy though. Sorry I'll stop. Just know that if you ever want to comment anything, I don't bite ;>