who are you?

three

jeongin tossed and turn around the sheets, unable to sleep as the events from earlier kept on replaying in his head.

he was disgusted with how hyunjin acted and he was even disappointed within himself for trying to defend the older's careless actions. just because he's drunk, that doesn't mean he could just do as he please.

his heart was still beating wildly against his chest and he knew immediately that there was no sleeping for him.

he removed his shirt as his body starts to heat up, then he walked towards the balcony. as soon as the doors clicked open, he embraced the cold wind that whip past him.

the night was beautiful, too bad he couldn't enjoy it with his favorite person.

hyunjin loves stargazing just as he does and they use to do that once they saw how many of them are scattered in the night sky. but now... even that smallest, simplest thing that required no effort at all? they couldn't do it together anymore.

ever since the older got back to work, things are starting to get busy and out of control. hyunjin barely had time to sleep, eat or whatsoever.

he barely even had time for jeongin and his own daughter, and when he comes home, he'd always reek of alcohol.

who could've thought this was the night he'd spiral out of control.

"i miss you jinnie."

their marriage is slowly falling apart, and the most painful part is that they know it both.

;

"good morning daddy." when akira got down for breakfast, she was slightly surprised to see only hyunjin on the dining table.

usually, jeongin was with him or at the kitchen preparing meals but right now, it was their maids who're putting dishes on the table.

"good morning, princess. how was your sleep?" hyunjin asked, diverting his eyes from the newspaper to look at his daughter.

"oh um .. i didn't get any." her smile fell slightly as she sat beside her father who now looked very concerned. hyunjin, was strict, but only when he has to.

he knows exactly why she didn't get any sleep because he too struggled the whole night. he was unused to having an empty space beside him and he couldn't stop thinking about jeongin.

"is it because of the arguing you heard, i'm sorry." he mumbled and started to put two pancakes on her plate. she looked at him with an understanding gaze.

she looks up to him so much, and she just wished he never touches a drop of alcohol again. akira was only scared of him whenever he's drunk because he gets too harsh and scary.

deep down, she knows her father wouldn't even think about hurting her. she likes this side of him more. sweet, caring and always puts his own daughter before himself.

daddy i wish you would just stop drinking...

"mm its okay daddy." she smiled, earning a soft ruffle on her head. "by the way, is dad still asleep? should i go wake him?" she was gracefully slicing the pancakes into long lines and she won't eat them until they're all cut precisely and in uniform.

hyunjin looked at what she's doing and deep down he felt a pang of pain for her. she's just like jeongin.

"no, sweetie. your dad has already left."

"for the grocery store? oh let me contact him-"

"he's back at the apartment, akira. he won't be staying here for awhile." he sighed, grabbing his coffee with shaky hands and downing it all.

the girl's face fell into a frown immediately and although she wanted to ask, she knows its best if she doesn't.

"but he will be back right?" from the corner of hyunjin's eyes, he could see her hands shaking violently without her even noticing.

"sweetie calm down, he's not that far, and he said he'll visit you. if you want, i could drive you there right now." he was trying to calm her down as he knows what would happen if she broke.

akira is so fragile. there was a time when they were helping her wash the paint off of her brushes, and even though the stains were gone easily, their daughter still went to an extent to wash them all again at least seven times.

then with her hands. at times, dinner would be a little too hectic as she was never satisfied with only washing once. her hands would already be scarred and red from washing it over and over again and even though jeongin wanted to help, how exactly would he do that when he too was struggling with the same disorder?

obsessive-compulsive disorder is not a joke.

"really daddy?" her face lit up, her hands and ragged breathing calming down a bit. her temper, anxiety and the tendency to break down easily is a struggle for them as well.

she's too young to feel these kinds of things and hyunjin can't help but blame himself sometimes. he often think that maybe it's the way he didn't raise her properly.

but if jeongin was here, he'd kiss him and assure him that he's done nothing wrong.

i need you innie