my only direction

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20.

LISA POV

"You had no right doing what you did, Lisa!"

It's been two days since I last saw Jennie. I haven't spoken to her, and I have no idea where her head's at. On top of that, my dad has just been informed of the whole situation by Mother Superior and was giving me his dutiful scolding.

"Go away, dad," I tell him from beneath the covers of my bed, where I've been mostly for the past two days.

"Do you know how badly this reflects on me?"

I shove the sheets off me in disbelief. "Is that all you're bothered about? Not everything is about you! I told you who I was. It was you who chose not to believe it."

"And out of all the girls in the world, you just had to go for a nun? In my Church?" He yells in exasperation.

"You're the one who forced me to meet them!"

"How was I supposed to know that you would seduce one? You truly have a special talent, Lisa."

"I did not seduce Jennie. She fell for me."

"Oh, because you're so irresistible?" He spouts sarcastically.

"I can't help it," I match his tone.

"You need to stay away from her, Lisa."

"It's not like she wants to see me anyway," I say in self-pity, not truly knowing if she did or not.

"Even if she did, you're not to see her."

"You can't stop me from doing that! She's not happy there, dad. It's not right to keep her there, and you know it."

"It's not our business, Lisa. As far as I'm aware, Jennie has chosen to repent."

"Repent? She's being guilt-tripped into being there. She doesn't want to stay there!"

"She was fine before she met you."

"That's what Mother Superior said as well, but Jennie's not some naïve, impressionable kid. She's a grown adult. I didn't corrupt her. I just helped her discover who she really is. All I did was help uncover a part of herself, and even if I never see her again, that part won't ever fade. She is who she is, and there's nothing wrong with her."

"She's taking her permanent vows in three days, Lisa."

My mouth dropped and I'm winded by the revelation. It takes a moment before I can even get my words together.

"What? No. She's still got a week left."

Dad's looking at me pitifully. "Jennie wants to move it up. It'll be done by this weekend."

"No," I repeat pointlessly.

"You're to stay away from her, Lisa," he says, but I'm already getting to my feet.

"I have to see her."

He blocks the doorway of my room. "Lisa, stay away from that girl, or I'm kicking you out."

This threat didn't have as much of an effect the second time around. All that mattered right now was Jennie.

"So do it," I challenge. "Kick me out. I don't care. You can't stop me from doing this. I'm eighteen. I can make my own decisions."

He doesn't stop me as I push past him and leave the house.

+

They weren't letting me see her. And by they, I meant Mother Superior. She had turned me away before I could even step foot in the convent.

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