Best Mistake (Someone somewhere in this world)

Chapter 9 - Thinking.

I lay in bed thinking about what Taylor told me earlier that day. Keira, Fiona and Hannah are already sleeping. The lights are all off and and all I hear are the girls breathing.

In my head I start forming a pro and contra list.

Pros and Cons of a relationship with Adam:

Pro: It's him, Adam. Adam O'Connor. He's sweet, caring, smart, helpful, a full gentleman. Also musical and artsy and sporty and great with kids. Plus he can cook and do his own laundry.

Pro: My parents know him and like him.

Pro: Luke loves him.

Pro: We have the same friends.

Pro: we do have a lot in common.

Contra: I don't know his parents and only met his mother just briefly and what if they'd hate me?

Big contra: I have anxiety and panic attacks. Who wants a girlfriend who has anxiety and panic attacks? Exactly! No one.

My list only contains two contras. I thought there were more, but no. Now you may think, nothings in my way and go get him, but I can't. He loves me but I don't know if I love him. Though, I know that I'm falling for him. Every day a little bit more. Every time he makes me smile I fall for him even more. But do I love him? Maybe. Ugh! How I hate that word. Maybe I do already love him and mix it up with falling for him but is that even possible? I don't think so. I'll know when I love him but for now, I just fall for him. Everyday a bit more. Sure is, that I'm pretty close to love him. But I guess there's just one thing missing.

Now, I know he loves me and I know that he loves me even though I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. But I don't know how. How can he love me?

- - - -

I can't remember when I fell asleep last night but I do remember my Pro and Contra list. I let my eyes close and thing about everything all over again.

"El, wake up!" Keira exclaims.

"I am awake" I say and rub my eyes. I open my eyes and push my bed sheet to the side. "Should I stand up?" I ask quietly.

"Yeah" Keira says. I sit up and see her already dressed and ready to go. Fiona and Hannah are styling their hair. I crawl out of bed and get ready in the bathroom. I forgot make up since we're going to be in a plane for long hours and I want to sleep. Since I showered yesterday evening, I don't have to shower again. I put my hair into a high pony tail and get dressed. I wear black leggings and I loose sweater. Combined with my vans and I'm ready for the day. When I get out of the bathroom again, I check if I have everything packed. Lastly I put my bathroom essentials in my suitcase and close it. Then I put my charger in my backpack and my water bottle.

- - - -

In the plane, I sit next to Ron. Keira sits next to Fiona and Hannah next to Taylor. Adam sits next to Sam few rows in front of me. Adam and I haven't talk for a while now and I kinda miss him. I don't know if he's ignoring me or if he's mad at me or if he's just giving me some space. He doesn't talk to anyone else than Ron either. Ron even told me that Sam and Adam had a short argument because Adam doesn't talk to Sam.

When we get out of the plane, Ron rushes out pulling me behind him. We get outside and Ron throws his backpack on the floor and falls on his knees and kisses the ground. I never saw him or anyone doing that and crack up laughing. He stand up again and takes his backpack. "What?" He asks and I laugh even more.

When Keira and the other come out, I calmed down. "Where've you been?" She asks.

"Here, Ron pulled me out" I explain to her. She forms an O with her lip and nods in understanding.

"Let's get the suitcases, students!" Mr.McAllister yells. With one arm up in the air he walks through the people to the luggage area. I'm not the tallest and follow his arm in the air. Sam and few other classmates are close behind me.

After we got our suitcases we walk to a coffee shop where all our parents were waiting for us. I spot my mother in the crowd talking to Keira's, Sam's and Adam's parents. My father isn't with them. Maybe he's parking, I think to myself. As I get closer to them, mum and Luke see me and grin at me. I open my arms, ready to hug mum first but Luke runs to me and hugs me, spinning us around. I trip but Adam catches me.

"Sorry" I mutter and stand up. Adam says nothing and goes to his mum. I see that his dad isn't here either and than I remember that I've never seen his father.

Anyway, Luke takes my suitcase for me and I hug my mum telling her that I missed her.

"I missed you too, Elisabeth" She says and pat's my back, which she only does when something bad happened. Last time she pat my back was when my grandmother died and the time before was when my dog died.

"Where's dad?" I ask when we break the hug. Her smile turns into a serious face.

"Home" Is the only thing she says.

We say to Mr.McAllister and I say bye to my friends before we leave the airport. In the car I ask mother again "Where is dad", but she doesn't answer. I look at Luke but he looks out of the window. When mum parks the car, I rush out and ran into the house. There I see something unexpected.