𝗰𝗵𝘂𝗰𝗸𝗮𝗯𝗼𝗼 ;; oneshots

HEADCAN(N)ON

A/N: So this 100% started as a way to poke some fun at how FREAKING common the misspelling of canon (and headcanon) have become (enough that typing "cannon" into Tumblr's GIF search thing, the first zillion things that come up are fandom things, not, y'know, boom-boom cannons). It sort of just...devolved from there.

Hawkmoth should have known better than to transform and try to akumatize anyone when he saw that Nooroo was in an ornery mood, he really should have.But he did it anyway. And now he had found a fanfiction writer who was upset because someone had called one of her...ideas implausible.

Apparently these ideas were called headcanons, but Hawkmoth didn't particularly care about that. It was just another convenient victim to use towards his goal. He launched into his normal spiel, leaning on his cane as he promised the akumas exactly what they wanted. And in this case-

"I will make all of my headcanons come true!" the girl cried, holding up her notebook. On the cover, in dark marker, was written Fanfictions and Headcannons.

Buried somewhere deep in Hawkmoth's consciousness, Nooroo noticed and perked up, making a very quick tweak to the akuma's design and powers before sinking back down into the back of Hawkmoth's mind before his wielder could notice.

A kilometer away, the latest akuma was enveloped in a cloud of billowing purple smoke. When it cleared, it revealed what was arguably the strangest akuma that Paris had seen to date.

Because while the body was relatively normal- a simple black fitted suit, with a gloved hand clutching the notebook- the head was not.

In place of a head was a stereotypical cannon, like what might be seen in a pirate movie, complete with fizzling fuse. Headcannon was written in elegant silver script along the side. She stumbled as she stood, slightly unbalanced by the weight where her head had been.

"I'll get the Miraculous, Hawkmoth!" she cried, her voice echoing up the cannon chamber. "And then all of my headcanons will come true!"

*****

Paris was not expecting to see someone with a cannon in place of a head stumbling around in the streets. Even with all of the strangeness that they had seen over the past few months, this was a whole new level of weird.

"We have what appears to be another akuma out and about, this time one that has a cannon for a head," Madam Chamack told Paris as she and her cameraman drove down the street towards the last known location of the supervillain. "Motivations are yet unknown, so we're going to go learn! Excuse me!" she called, motioning for the driver to stop and hopping out of the van. The image shook as the camera scrambled to follow. "Can you tell Paris a little bit about yourself?"

"I am Headcannon, and I will make my headcanons reality!" the akuma yelled, stepping towards Madam Chamack. "And you- you will help me on my journey first!"

The fuse sparkled brighter, and then there was an almighty BANG! Once the smoke settled, Madam Chamack was stumbling around, clutching the cannon that had replaced her head. On the side, there was an embossed Ladybug and Chat Noir are dating.

"Wait, that's not supposed to happen!" Headcannon exclaimed. "What- Hawkmoth, what's happening? You promised-! Fix it!"

The cameraman made a break for it when the purple mask appeared, leaving Madam Chamack to stumble blindly around. The van tore back around the corner, ignoring the akuma arguing with Hawkmoth.

Several blocks over, Hawkmoth was more than a little puzzled. His akuma was complaining about misfiring powers, and since he couldn't exactly see what, exactly, was going on, that left him only one option.