He Says He's Just A Friend

Chapter 24 - Addicted to Love

- Clay -

I sat in my car in front of Emmett's house, waiting for him to come out. I drummed my hands on the steering wheel, my heart pounding harder than the bass in the Kendrick Lamar song pumping through the speakers. The last two months since meeting Emmett had been the most exciting of my life. They'd also been the most confusing two months of my life.

Before Emmett, I never had these feelings for guys. Though, if I were being honest, I never had these feelings for girls either. I pursued relationships with girls because it was expected that I should have a girlfriend. My friends always made a big a deal of it whenever I was single, constantly pushing me to go after some girl I had no interest in. Brandon still hadn't dropped his pursuit to get me laid. Just yesterday, he said, "Just find a person you think is hot. It doesn't matter who they are." In their defense, it was partially my fault for not telling them how I felt, rather than just shrugging them off. They just wanted me to be happy.

If only I could tell my friends that I was single because the person I desperately wanted didn't want me back.

Besides, there was something special about Emmett. Sure, I wanted to be with him, but more than that, I wanted to know him. And if I had to squash my attraction down until it gave me an ulcer, I would. I needed Emmett in my life. I craved Emmett. My veins ached for their next fix. My heart throbbed every time I passed his street. Not even his house. Just the sight of the fucking street was enough to raise my blood pressure.

Thankfully, Emmett didn't get weirded out earlier when I kissed his cheek. I got caught up in the moment with Emmett being so close and so cute. A bit of my true feelings bubbled up before I could stamp out the idea.

And I got off easy with Emmett's request being reading a book. I would read a thousand books if he wanted. It was honestly a good thing that he wasn't aware of the power he held over me. All he needed was to ask and I would do anything for him.

Emmett rushed out the front door. The sight of him made my heart flutter.

I allowed myself to the count of five to ogle him, concealed in the dark oasis of my car.

One...

His black hair swept into a perfect mess.

Two...

His sharp-cut jawline sporting the tiniest bit of stubble. I wanted to rub my cheek against it to feel the scratchy satisfaction.

Three...

His lips that sang a siren's song luring me to the dangerous idea of letting my own lips meet them.

Four...

The pale pink button-down shirt that clung to his taut frame, allowing me a wondrous glimpse of what lay beneath; all that tan skin my fingers itched to explore.

Five...

The no-man's-land—the no-Clay-land—beneath his belt that led to all kinds of scary, lovely, thrilling ideas.

Emmett opened the door, spreading light across the car. I pushed my legs together to hide the tightness in the front of my jeans and brought my hands down to the bottom of the steering wheel as extra cover. His sweet scent filled my nose, making my mouth water. I wanted to bury my face in the nape of his neck, to inhale that scent, getting high off him.

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," Emmett said.

When the dome light extinguished, I unplugged the aux cable from my phone, cutting off Kendrick mid-verse, and handed it to Emmett. That had become a habit. I did everything in my power to make Emmett comfortable and content around me, hoping it would make him want to spend even more time with me.