Past or Now

Rose 2

POV - You got overwhelmed and passed out but Tammy and Lou helped you back inside and now you've agreed to talk to Rose.

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Part 19

Y/n - "Umm I just want to say firstly that this is nothing on you Rose it just happens sometimes and I don't want you to think that you caused it. It's just my anxiety and I just got overwhelmed that's all."

She nods and you take her hand.

Y/n - "And umm I'm so sorry. I umm don't really understand where it's come from... I had no idea and I just feel so bad as I thought it was obvious that you two had something. I love seeing you both laughing and chatting with huge smiles on your faces... it was sometimes all I needed these past few days to keep going after hours of work so umm to be the one who has come in between that I just feel so bad Rose. I would never want to come into that ever as to me it seemed so perfect. I think that's why it and so many other things in my mind from today just all got the better of me and I shut down."

Rose - "No umm don't I umm really umm you're an amazing person y/n. It's of no doubt that you would be a person worth admiring so I can't really fault her. I think umm I umm just want to know if you Umm feel the same... because if you do then I can start to sort myself out and leave you both to it but if you don't then that just makes it even more complicated and-"

Y/n - "Rose... umm if I'm truly honest... I have never really thought about Daph in that way. She just seemed like a fun person and I mean don't get me wrong she's gorgeous and truly a beautiful person. But I've never really felt anything more than that. I umm I kind of have a thing for umm shit umm don't say anything about this to anyone okay?"

Rose nods and you continue.

Y/n - "I umm kind of like Lou."

Rose - "I knew it!"

Y/n - "What?"

Rose - "Well I was kind of hoping it anyway. I could see it in her face when Daph said it and even when Nine joked I looked straight at her and saw that she was uncomfortable. That she umm had something on her mind and I was even more adamant when we were outside. I've seen the way you guys are around eachother y/n and that's kind of why it hurt more... to think that she liked you. Someone who was probably not even interested in her and yet she had just completely skimmed over the fact that I was so over the top in love with her and she hadn't noticed or felt anything back. I couldn't even just go up to her and look her in the eyes and say daphne I fucking love you in fear that she saw you in me and not just me. That she never even gave me a thought and that almost hurt more than the initial."

You hug her tightly as she tears up and kiss her forehead stroking her hair.

Y/n - "The mind can be cruel Rose... I'm proof of that after what just happened out there. But it can also tell you things about yourself before your body even gives it a second thought. Thinking about someone when their presence may not even be in the room or even the country, is the minds way of telling you what and who's in your heart. That person doesn't have to be a love or potential partner. They probably half of the time are just destined to be a close friend. But it's hard to detach from that once you get an idea. You become almost blind from anything but that and you fail to see when others are giving you anything or maybe even more than the person on your mind. I umm I love Tammy. I always have and always will but it doesn't mean that I don't also have Lou on my mind. It's hard to battle them but once you find comfort and closure in one it gets easier. I umm think you need to talk to daphne. And talk about how you're feeling. Whether you want me there even if it's just to say how I feel before you confess then that's fine I just want to be here for you okay."

Before she can answer you're both interrupted and part from the hug.

Daphne - "There's no need."

You both turn to find daphne stood by the door with tears.