Chapter 15

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I sit on my bed and look out of the window, when suddenly my phone starts to ring. God, who's that this late. I pick it up and role my eyes. Of course it's Hanji. Who else did I expect. ,,What do you want, foureyes?", I ask annoyed and they giggle. ,,Just wanted to ask how you are.", they answer in a thone, where I even wonder, how I can even hear them. ,,And that's what you called me for in the middle of the night?" ,,You didn't answer my question." I sight. ,,I'm fine, okay? Now let me sleep." ,,Come on, we both know, you're not gonna sleep." True shit. ,,I just don't wanna talk to you right now, okay?" ,,Nawww, why? Oh, and I wanted to ask you something else!" I groan annoyed. ,,And what?" ,,Since you didn't want to come to the last one for some reason, I'm organising a second dinner next weekend and this time you're cominng! No discussion! Oh, and bring you friend with you! What was his name again?" ,,You mean Eren?" ,,Yeah, Eren! Anyway, I'm going to bed now. Night, shorty!" ,,Yeah, night. And don't call me that!" Then Hanji hangs up and I sight. I don't think I'll sleep much tonight. I already tried, but the picture of Eren laying in my arms comes to my mind over and over again and just won't go away. I hate myself. So unbelievable much. For a second I think about going over to his room, but throw that thought away. I'm trying to get a level down with Eren and this wouldn't help. But otherwhise I wouldn't get a single hour of sleep and I'm fucking tired...No, I can't do that! I made a mistake with letting him sleep in my room at first. Fuck, I can't sit here and do nothing! Just sitting won't be so bad, wouldn't it? With a sight I stand up from my bed and go over to Eren's room. Slowly I open the door and see the brunette sleeping in his bed. I take a deep breath, bevore I sit on the free side of it and look at Eren. My Eren. I don't wanna ever let him go, but one day I'll have to. ,,You probably think I hate you, don't you? I just want you to know, that that's not true. I've never felt for anyone like that ever bevore. But I know, I can't have you the way I want to. I'm just not able to love you the way you deserve it. You wouldn't be happy with me. I'd just hurt you and then you'd leave me. Ugh, you're really fucking my head, you know that, Eren?" Great, now I'm already talking to myself! I look at the floor for a while, bevore I look up to Eren again. After all I'm happy, I found him. I take a deep breath, bevore I lean over him and press my lips against his. Suddenly I feel Eren's arms wrapping around my neck and I pull back. Did he hear me? No, he probably waked up from me kissing him so suddenly. ,,I-I'm sorry, I'm going.", I say and wanna go, but Eren graps my wrist and looks at me with tired eyes. ,,Stay. Please.", he says and I sight. Just tonight will be okay, I guess. ,,Fine.", I say after a few seconds and lay next to him. The brunette instantly cuddles into my chest and wraps his arms around me. ,,When exactly did you wake up?", I ask and Eren looks at me. ,,When you kissed me.", he answers and closes his eyes again. Good. So he didn't hear me. ,,Can I ask you something?", Eren asks after a while and I nood slowly. He takes a deep breath. ,,How many people have been here already?" Shit. I wish, he didn't ask that, but I promised him, to be honest. ,,15 women." Silence. ,,And men?" ,,None. You're the first one." He noods and sights. ,,That's a lot of women.", he whispers and looks away. I just sight and close my eyes. Like that I can sleep and I really do after a few minutes. 

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