I Want You

Twenty-Two

TW: mentions of eating disorders and self-harm

Jasper's POV

It's been two weeks. Two very long weeks.

Two weeks since he kicked me out.

Two weeks since I've spoken to him.

Two weeks since it felt like my heart shattered.

I know I hadn't known him for long but it feels like so much longer. He always felt so safe to be around. Always made me smile and get butterflies at the worst times. His smile was like a breath of fresh air, pure and true.

Fuck I hated him for what he did to me. Hated that he made me feel like this. Hated that all I could think about was him.

I didn't want to see his face at all but it was hard when we went to the same school, were in the same class and lived right next to each other. But I couldn't stop the constant feeling of wanting to be around him. To want to hear his voice, touch him, have him say my name. But he didn't want anything to do with me.

He kicked me out.

Fuck I hate him. I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him.

So why do I miss him so much...

It wasn't long after we stopped talking that Philip had moved seats in class. He sat alone in the back, away from me. He wouldn't even look my way. As soon as the bell would ring, he was already packed up and racing out the door. I didn't know if he had blocked my number but I didn't want to text him to find out. I just wanted to assume the best and hope he'd change his mind and come back to me.

"Ms. Milligan there is no sleeping in my class!"

My head shot up as I heard my teacher scold me from the board. It was final hour and all I wanted to do was go home and lay with Toby. I hadn't been sleeping lately, or eating really. In the past 3 days I'd gotten maybe 5 hours of sleep at best and had only 2 apples.

"Sorry..." I responded quietly, and she went back to explaining whatever was on the board. I couldn't even see what was written down. My vision was fuzzy and my head was swirling after being awaken so abruptly.

I tried my best to stay at least half awake and by the time the bell rang to let us out I was practically racing down the halls to get out of the hellhole.

My head was still spinning slightly so I didn't even notice the fact that there was someone in front of me.

I landed on my ass before I could even process what had happened and shook my head, hearing a faintly familiar voice from above. "We meet once again." I look up to see Josh's face staring down at me. I really didn't want to deal with this idiot. "Are you alright love?"

He extends a hand to me and knowing better than to try and get up myself, I take it.

I'm quickly pulled up faster than expected and practically tumble into him once again, holding my head and trying to get my bearings.

I mumble out a "sorry" and attempt to walk past him. However, his hand shoots out and grabs me by the waist, turning me to face him.

"Are you alright? You look pale." His eyes showed a bit of genuine concern but I remembered what Philip had said about him.

Giving a weak smile I shake my head, "I'm fine, sorry for running into you."

Josh smirks and rubs the back of his head, "no worries, any excuse to talk to you and I'm happy."

He was definitely a charmer, I'll give him that.

"You seriously don't look too good though, can I give you a ride home?" He looks down at me and places a hand on my shoulder.