Broken Glass | D.M.

one

Here I am, I thought as I walked to my dorm room in Ravenclaw tower. A start to yet another school year. My 6th year. Great.

I arrive at my room. A queen size bed with deep blue silk sheets lays in the center of the room. There's a wooden desk in the corner with a large bookshelf next to it. On the opposite wall is a spacious closet, a fire place, and a door that leads to a private bathroom. I have a single; after 5 years at Hogwarts, I at last have a room all to myself. Not that I have any friends to share a dorm with anyway.

About halfway through last year, I left my toxic friend group. For years, I tried to convince myself that they were amazing friends, especially my supposed best friend, Maura. "It's okay that she uses your insecurities against you," I told myself. "It's fine that she always puts you down and makes you feel shitty about yourself, it's not like she's doing it on purpose. Right? Maura always listen to your problems. She's so supportive, she's an amazing friend."

But I guess one day it clicked. One day, I realized that your best friend isn't supposed to make comments about your weight and what you eat, especially when she knows you have an eating disorder. Undiagnosed, but nevertheless, still a struggle. "I only ate dinner today," she would say. She would always make it clear that she weighed less than me: "Oh, I weigh 85 pounds," she would tell me. I didn't understand at the time, but she was definitely lying. How could Maura, who's 5 inches taller than me, weigh less than me? I'll give it to her, she is skinny, I've always been jealous of that, but there's just no way she weighs 85 lbs at a height of 5'7.

I begin to unpack my belongings and decorate my room with a minimalist but cozy aesthetic. All blue and bronze, of course, to match my house colors.

The hours pass by fast and it's time for dinner. I slip on my robe and head down to the Great Hall.

In the corridors, I hear students talking to their friends, catching up and telling stories about their fabulous summers. A feeling of loneliness passes over me as I walk alone.

I sit through the sorting ceremony for what feels like hours on end. Finally, the feast begins. Mounds of delicious food, every kind you could imagine, from sweet to salty, appears on the table. I would love to take a bite of the pasta, or maybe have a cookie or two. But I can't. Because a bowl of pasta (600 cal), and a cookie (250 cal), would turn straight into fat.

Over the summer, I somehow managed to gain back almost all of the 20 lbs I had lost last school year. It's too hard to restrict at home with my parents constantly breathing down my back, making sure I eat. But here, I can do whatever I want. I'm free.

         *               *               *               *               *

After dinner, I follow my house prefect up the stairs back to Ravenclaw Tower. When we arrive in the common room, she makes an announcement.

"Everyone, listen up. As you all know, the amount of visits to the infirmary last year due to self harm, substance abuse, suicide attempts, and other reasons pertaining to mental health skyrocketed. As a result, there's a new health policy this year. Everyone will receive routine physical exams and mental health check ins to ensure the health and safety of students. These visits will occur quite regularly, about once every month or two. Your first meeting will be tomorrow. You'll receive an owl shortly from Madam Pomfrey with your time slot."

Shit. Wizards and witches have been struggling with mental health forever. But in the past few years, it's gotten a lot worse. Well, it didn't exactly get worse, but people started paying more attention to it. Since then, the ministry of magic placed some policies that drew more attention to mental health, especially for teenagers. But a physical once a month? That means height, weight, and vitals.

————————————————————————

Note form the author:
Hi loves! I'm going to update another few chapters tomorrow and this weekend. This is a new story that I just started today so please stick with it! If you have any suggestions please let me know. Also, please vote! Love you all ❤️