[MUS2] Taming In The Wild|✔

CHAPTER 32

Dedicated to:blyanailaria
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Chapter 32

Dareen Pov

I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth. And I've never known until now, kung paano ba talaga ang mamuhahy dito sa labas. It was so stupid of me to leave Rap's house without a plan ahead of me. It was so stupid of me to have the audacity to leave his house with only a small amount of money in my hand. It was so stupid of me to leave and not think about how I could live outside of his house, without his care, without his support. Above all my folly, falling in love with someone who can't move on from their past was the most folly of all. Falling in love with Raphael Laurence Marcet was the most stupid thing I ever did in my life. I think. But I'm a gay man with principles, so I will stick to my decision and I will not go back to his house. May pa speech na ako kay Chiara at Yassy, 'no. Ika-papangit ko iyon kung babalik ako.

I took a deep sighed.

I thought I was the master of our game. I thought I was the one who was playing. I thought I could play it well since I already had enough experience. I thought I had already learned my lessons, but it seems like I was fooling myself. I was just having an illusion. Illusions suggest that I can suppress my feelings. I have illusions that I can win the stupid game I started. I had a fantasy that Rap would one day fall for someone like me.Illusions that I might change him? His heart? I already had enough. I've already experienced enough pain. But what Rap's pain brought me was like a whole new thing in my existence. I thought pinakamasakit na iyong nangyari sa amin ni Geoffrey. Akala ko masakit na iyong itaboy ako ng sarili kong pamilya sa bahay namin. Yet, here I am wandering around, bringing my bleeding and aching heart. I didn't know until now that I was capable of feeling like this. It felt like I was being held in the neck. I felt like my heart was being squeezed. I feel suffocated by everything. 

"Jesus! Please, look on your way!"

Napatingin ako sa babae na nasa harapan ko. Dahil sa pagkabundol niya sa akin ay natauhan ako sa paglalakad ko dito sa tabing daan. I looked at her head to toe. Wearing a fitted pink dress, a stilleto and a jacket around her shoulder. Her also carries her purse—Chanel bitch and her latest Iphone. Damn!

"I... I am sorry." I said and bend my head a lil bit.

"Tssk! Please don't walk around having deep thoughts. Reserve that for your home."

Hindi ko siya inimik at nanatili lang na niyuko ko ang ulo ko sa kanya. Hanggang sa nakita ko na lang na papaalis na iyong paa niya. Kung nasa wastong pag-iisip lang ako ngayon baka nakakita na ako ng away. Kung sana nasa buhay ko ako dati  nsampal ko na rin ang babaeng iyon ng lumilipad na Louis Vuitton kong bag. Gusto ko na siyang pabulanan na ano ang ginagawa ng kagaya niya na sosyalera sa isang kalye! But I choose to shut my beautiful mouth and choose to not to waste my precious saliva over her.

I held my head up. Kanina pa ako naglalakad at di ko talaga alam kung ano ang gagawin ko. Mainit na at namumula na rin ang balat ko. I feel so exhausted. Tired. Sleepy. Shemz! Napatingin ako sa paligid ko at nang may makita akong isang upuan—no it is more like a bench outside nang park. Hindi iyon naiinitan dahil may mga halaman naman na tatayog sa tabi kaya naisipan ko munang umupo doon. I need to rest my beauty. Damn this.

Nang makaupo ako doon si sementong bench ay napa-massage ako sa binti ko dahil sumasakit iyon. Di talaga sanay ang ganda ko sa mahahabang lakaran. Stress na stress na ang ganda at ayaw ko nang tumingin sa salamin dahil baka di ko na makilala ang sarili ko. Jesus!