Life Ruined by Empathy

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It is around lunchtime, so I move away from the door to get food. I slowly turn the handle with them still bashing.

"FOOD!". I quickly open the door causing Carter and Ryder to fall, and all the other guys jump.

I feel like my role in this house is to annoy them. Don't look at me like that, they deserve it. They should have known what to expect when they allowed me to live here.

"Anyone getting lunch?" I mainly aim this towards Ryder because I think we need to have a deep conversation.

I wait for a reply, but none come. Well then. I beg Ryder to go get food with me. He finally gives in. Thank the Lord.

Smiling, I extend my hand and direct my speech to him, "Let's go". He happily takes my hand and we start running down the street. There has been a lot of running today. I got to maintain fitness somehow, right?

"Alright, so I have a feeling you wanted me to join you for some other reason than to get food". I thought I was good at lying, apparently not.

"Why would you think that?". I reply with a teaspoon of sarcasm.

"Luna". He says. He is acting serious and it scares me just a little. This guy is so mysterious.

"Prove it". I regret saying this immediately. He picks me up of course. I should have seen this coming.

"Okay, okay, put me down". He stops and just waits for me to speak.

"It's not court, so I'm not admitting to anything"

"So then what was the point of bringing me here with you?"

"Rude. You don't think I just want to spend time with you?". Of course I don't actually mean this but it will be funny to see his reaction.

"No. I don't think you just 'want to spend time with me'." Not the response I was expecting.

"Fine, I will tell you. But we have to buy food first".

"Deal".

Once we reached the shop Ryder stops directly in front of me. I've always dread moments like these when I will be the one who has to start the conversation. In fact, Ryder saw this and was purposely waiting for me to start. I frown at him. How dare he always find my weaknesses. I better start now. I mean why delay?

"So you know the night that I fainted?" I see his eyes immediately lose their sparkle. He knows whats coming, "Well, I wanted to ask you about the photo's in the watch. Only if you're okay to talk about it". He looks down at his feet. This is the first time I've seen him nervous. It's weird. I have always known him as an outgoing type of person. I guess I haven't known him for that long though. I take a few steps towards him. Putting one hand on his back, I lift his chin and stare at him. He's going to reply some way or another, even if it kills me.

I break the silence, "Now you know why I was reluctant." He sighs.

"It was five years ago," He closes his eyes, "Life had been harsh for years, but I had finally reached my breaking point. My brother, Tide,had gotten exactly what he wanted, me to be punished. You see, I had never been the perfect kid my parents wanted, but they would still pretend we were a family in public. No one knew what happened behind closed doors. That's when an advertising company noticed us and took multiple photos of us much like the one in the locket. It was the most fun I had in years. But then they left me when I was 6 or 7 years old and sued the company. I was always neglected and mistreated. I was miserable, but it was okay because shortly after my great grandfather gave me everything I could possibly need- love," A tear fell down his cheek. "He was in the Army and was forced to leave after he developed a mental illness. I can admit, he was weird, he could be annoying and sometimes he completely had no idea who I was, but he was the only person who treated me fairly."

Great furey came across his face, "Tide, was like my parents. He had no empathy or even sympathy. He never acknowledged me in the whole time he was a part of my life. Only to yell at me or tell me I did something wrong. It was as if he was jealous. When I was younger, I remember starting to believe my name was worthless and Ryder was a nickname or something. In the presence of my grandfather I realised my parents and Tide were incredibly wrong. I slapped Tide in the face at let all my emotions rawr at him. He saw this as an opportunity to attack and threw a knife at my face, luckily he missed but he got my arm instead. Grandfather, with his illness, blamed me for it and sent me in to the cellar. It was dark. After a day or two, I couldn't take it anymore, I started to go insane. I worked my way out the only window by stacking boxes and hoping they didn't crash. Tide saw me doing this and ran to grandfather. He couldn't allow me to get more attention, so that was it. He picked up that same knife and stabbed grandfather in the heart. He had a lucky shot, I say. Lucky for him. I was forced to watch the whole situation go down and the agony my grandfather felt. "

At this point tears were streaming down my face as well as his. I felt so bad that I made him bring this up. I just wanted to hug him and apologise a million times over but I just let him continue.

"After I lost my grandfather, my whole attitude towards life changed. I was determined. Instead of being a worthless idiot in the corner, I forced myself to become independent. I came across an abandoned house and thought it would be my best hope to become independent there. I started fixing it up and making it clean enough to call a home. This is when the guys found me. Carter was the first and we bonded straight away. It was the first time I felt I belonged and I felt like I could be myself."

"Promise me something". He says

"Anything".

"Keep this to yourself. You're the only person I have ever told. None of the guys know this, not even Carter".

"I promise".

I hug him tightly and he returns it with the same feeling. We stay there for a long time and finally we let go only to kiss. I realise it has got extremely late. The other guys would be wondering where we are. I slowly pull away.


"You're a strong man, Ryder. I couldn't imagine you any other way."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

HEY! Continuing on last week, here's another quote: "Silence is a source of great strength."- Lao Tzu. Sorry for any silly mistakes.

Until next time, over and out! BYES >_<

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