back to you | paul atreides

twenty nine

"It scares me." Lady Jessica answered, referring to her pregnant belly. "But at least I know my daughter will be safe here, away from Harkonnen hands."

I nodded. The two of us were seated side-by-side in one of the tents. Curtains were draped from the ceiling and formed the walls around us, giving us privacy. Paul and the other Fremen were searching the sietch for Duke Leto's soldiers.

"When did you tell Paul?"

She shook her head. "I didn't have to. He just knew..."

I narrowed my eyes. How was it that he just knew? My thoughts wandered to myself... If somehow he just knew his mother was pregnant, it must be possible he knows about me too, right? That would explain his odd behaviour earlier.

That thought made me queasy. I wanted to tell Paul about being... pregnant, on my own terms. The idea of pregnancy still scared me and I had yet to say it out loud. I haven't even really used that word in my thoughts, either. To do so would mean it's real. I wasn't ready for this to be real.

"Paul's abilities have progressed far beyond what I would have expected from him," His mother muttered, her eyes trained on the ground. "It concerns me. This power he has acquired means the Fremen look to him. They see their prophet in my son, and I think I do too." Her eyebrows pressed together, almost in shame. "I don't know if I'm meant to be scared for him, or of him."

I didn't know how to answer her. I knew Paul's training had progressed significantly since I had left Arrakis, but I had no idea to what degree. I trusted Paul to moderate his skills, but to hear the concerns of his Bene Gesserit mother brought on a sense of unease.

What would she think if she knew I was pregnant with her son's child? Would she be angry? Sad? I knew she would be supportive regardless of her feelings if I was carrying an Atreides heir. 

"I spoke with Shipo." She said, breaking the silence. "She told me about your mother."

My eyes widened in surprised. I knew this was a conversation I'd have with her at some point, though I never expected it to come so soon. "Yeah, I was surprised. I had no idea."

She nodded in agreement. "I'm not going to lie Ophelia, so was I." She stared off as her thoughts wandered. "Gurney very seldom mentioned your mother unless he had to, and he especially never revealed any of these details. I'm not even sure if he knew..."

"Neither do I." I agreed. "I wonder if she ever shared that with him, but It's in the past." I met her eyes and searched for any sign of distress or anxiety. "What did... what do you think?"

She made a face of confusion. "About your mother or the fact you posses hereditary Bene Gesserit aptitudes?" She shook her head at me. "Dear, I'm not sure what your concerns are about, but whoever birthed you makes no difference to who you are, and neither do your skills in the Weirding way."