seven

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GEORGIE

Staying home is going well.. at least it is for me.

I think Joey is slowly losing his mind, mostly because of Louis and me being together 24/7 now. Don't get me wrong, Louis was as mad as Joey was in the beginning but he quickly forgot all about it. The excitement of me being more at home with him was stronger than the anger.

Joey is the one who works to provide for the family, therefore Louis can stay at home. I joke a lot about how he's the stay at home mom but he doesn't find that as funny as I do. Anyways, it means that I've been able to spend everyday with Louis so far.

"Don't tell your brother this.. but I'm so glad you got expelled." Louis says as he sticks his fork in the piece of cake I just gave him.

"Same." I chuckle, now cleaning up the mess I made in the kitchen.

Boredom has led me to do lots of activities, one of them being baking. It helps me form a distraction from the fact that I'm still not over how disappointed Joey is in me.

Not that I don't get it, because I do. Joey had to work hard to get to where he is today. He has made sure that I got every chance in life to make it far but I've been messing up more than anything else. I'm just not like him, not a student and therefore it'll be hard for me to get a high position at some job like he has.

"Stop worrying, Joey loves you and that's the reason he's still mad." Louis says after swallowing the bite he just took.

"I know. It's just that it's Thursday already. He's been ignoring me for three days straight and I just don't want it to turn out like it did with Amanda.." I tell him, feeling the tears burn in my eyes but I swallow them away.

The whole thing with my mother also started with a fight we had, not about school because she doesn't care about that but about something stupid like me not doing the dishes. She started to ignore me and it came to the point where she would just disappear for days, not speaking to me unless it was to curse me out.

"It won't. Joey is nothing like Amanda, he just needs some time." Louis explains.

"Yeah, that's also what I thought she needed.." I mumble, throwing the towel on the counter and sighing.

I decide to go and have a walk, clear my mind and probably cry a bit. I'm not one that likes to cry at home, definitely not in front of other people. I don't like them seeing me so vulnerable. On my way out of the house, I steal some of Louis' cigarettes and the spare lighter that lays in the living room.

It's cold, I'm only wearing some flannel as a jacket and that was not my smartest move. However, the cold ripping through my clothes and hitting my skin does me good. My mind is numbing my body so I wouldn't have to feel too many emotions, so being cold is one of the first things I've felt in a while.

The park is not that far from my place and it's always been a friend to me when I needed one. I always place myself on the same bench and it has really become a comfort thing over time.

Lighting the cigarette, I take a big drag so the smoke would fill up my lungs and warm up my chest. I blow out the debris and watch as it catches the wind and fades away in the air.

The silence is good for letting my thoughts speak to me, however I don't really know if that is the thing I need right now. I'm feeding myself with all the negative thoughts that go through my brain, it's very hard to see the positive right now.

"Smoking is bad for you, you know?"

I tense up as I hear his voice, a part of me is thinking I'm imagining it but I soon realize that I'm not. He becomes visible in the corner of my eye when he walks closer towards the bench I'm sitting on.

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