𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙱𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚎 𝙰𝚏𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚛 || 𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙿𝙻𝙴𝚃𝙴𝙳

Chapter Twenty-Nine

I wake up tangled in his arms. Our legs are linked together. my head rests upon his chest listening to his heartbeat. I stretch making Landon stir a bit.

I wipe the sleep out of my eye before adjusting them back onto Landon's face to see him looking at me already, "Good morning sweetheart, how'd you sleep?" his hand brush some hair out of my face before placing a soft kiss on my head.

My stomach bubbles at the slightest bit of affection. The three words linger on the tip of my tongue again. I swallow down the words so I can speak, "Morning, and I slept alright," I gently push myself away from him making his arms tighten around me pulling me back.

"Where are you going?" he asks snuggling his head into the crook of my neck.

I take a deep breath it's okay don't say it, don't say it, "I need to go to the bathroom," I try pushing away again, "I really need to go," with a groan he loosens his arms around me.

"You come right back after or I swear to god," he mumbles flipping onto his stomach.

I walk into the bathroom locking the door behind me. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

I don't know what to do. I hate him.

I hate him so much.

He keeps playing with my feelings.

He acts like he cares then fucks me and goes for days without calling.

He makes weak promises and holds me in his arms as if I was his.

He calls me "my girl" but all we do is fuck.

I hate being in love with someone who has a stupid mojo of no love no kids bullshit. It's driving me mad, and I can't do it anymore I can't keep pretending as if I haven't fallen for him as if we are just simple fuck buddies.

His sweet words make my heart swore in the moment, but shatter completely after knowing there's no future for us. I flush the toilet and turn the tap on to sound like I went to the bathroom. I unlock the door to find him passed out on the bed.

Perfect.

I quietly tiptoe around him picking up the bag with my wet clothes. I'll give his clothes to Lyon when I babysit him and Rose later.

I grab my phone off the bedside table making sure not to wake him.

I successfully get out of the room without making a noise. I walk downstairs when my phone slips out of my hand causing a loud thud to echo through the quiet house, "Fuck, fuck, fuck," I curse under my breath bending down to pick it up.

I stand back up hearing the house is still quiet. I let out a sigh of relief and continue heading to the front door, "Going somewhere?" his deep voice rumbles through my body.

I turn around to see Landon standing at the bottom of the stairs glaring at me, "Hey you were asleep so I thought I would go and get some work done," I give him a crooked smile.

He scoffs unpleased with my answer, "What is going on with you lately? You avoid me most of the time. Showing up at my house wanting sex but then when I try to talk to you, you get all scared and scurry away," I swallow as the lump in my throat.

"Landon, I don't know what you're talking about I've been busy making a wedding dress and you've been busy with lawyer stuff," he cocks his eyebrow give me an unpleased look, "And for showing up your house wanting to fuck you isn't that technically the whole point of being fuck buddies Landon," his jaw clenches at my words, "That was the whole deal was it not," his lips fall into a thin line.

"You always bring up the deal, why is that?" why is that? Why is that! I don't know maybe it's to remind myself that you will never love me like I love you! "Why do you always have to bring up the deal and point out we're only just fuck buddies you might as well make a fucking shirt at this point with the saying "Landon and I are only fuck buddies we have a deal!" for fuck sake," a deal that keeps my friend out of jail.

"Fuck you, Landon!" he looks at me with knitted eyebrows, "I hate you- I hate you so fucking much!" a single tear trickles down my cheek.

"You hate me?"

"I hate you for making me agree to this deal I hate you for forgiving me some hope that you'll feel the same way about me that we'll have a future! And I hate you for making me fall in love with you!" his body tense at my words.

He looks as if he is taken aback by it all. I scoff not surprised, "The deal is off don't try to contact me or show up at my work or anywhere. And if you're a decent guy you'll burn the flash drive," he doesn't say anything, not a word he just stares at me with wide eyes, "Good-bye Landon," and with one last final glance, I walk out of his house with a broken heart... no a shattered heart.

I'm alone again. I'm left to pick myself off the ground yet again. I'm left heartbroken and a mess and just as I was finally getting somewhere.

I walk out of the neighborhood with one last glance seeing if maybe just maybe he got in one of his cars to tract me down, but nope there's no sign of one of his cars at all. I feel my lip quiver and a rush of tears stream down my cheeks, "Who am I kidding?" I wipe away my tears and continue walking with my head hung.

He just stood there staring at me I gave him some time to say something to walk up to me and kiss me... to tell me he loves me back.

But no.

Not.

A.

Damn.

Single.

Word.

It hurts even more that he just let me leave. He just let me walk out without saying anything, without saying "Sorry I don't love you back" or just a simple sorry would have said it all but no. That's too hard for him.

Why does love have to exist? It's stupid and it breaks people's hearts leaving them to fall apart. They wallow in their self-pity questioning everything they did in the relationship wondering if they were the problem for months.

It sucks, but my heartbreak is a little different because Landon and I were never together... we were fuck buddies that's simply it and I was stupid enough to let myself think there was a future between us letting my heart fall madly in love with him and his stupid words.

Well, at least the hard part is over now. It's all out in the open that I love him, but he doesn't love me back and the deals off.

The deal is off... he has the flash drive he could do anything, but I'm putting all my trust into him that he burns it.

I guess I just have to wait and find out what his next move is with the flash drive.

I hate how much I'm trusting him right now. I mean that's my best friend's life I'm putting at risk all because of my stupid feelings.