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Summary: cause I found this funny
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His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, Ranboo's spaghetti
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TommyInnit the courageous and athletic and handsome and charismatic vigilante, is sick.
Yes, take a moment - a minute to comprehend. Tommy understands if you are shocked beyond belief; it is truly unbelievable to think that he of all beings would succumb to a puny cold.
"Tommy stop whining."
He sneezes.
"Oh god ew, cover your nose man," Tubbo complains, shying away from the blanketed bundle of germs.
Tommy glares, eyes red, "I'll do it again," He warns.
Tubbo screws up his face in that one expression that is made just for Tommy, it's a mixture of disgust, disappointment, despair and deep ire. Tommy calls it the Quadruple D Expression, or QDE™️ as a quick and simple initialism.
"It's just a spoonful," Tubbo rolls his eyes, nudging the tablespoon forward.
"You're trying to kill me," Tommy declares, lips pursed.
"Not yet," Tubbo smiles, "But you're driving me closer to the edge every second."
"The edge of what?" Tommy sniffs.
"Mass genocide."
Jesus, this guy seriously needs therapy. "You ever tried therapy, big man?" Tommy suggests like the kind person he is. God, Tommy is so kind, so good, such a saint; here he is, on his deathbed, dying, and he's spending his last moments being emotional support for his deranged best friend. No one is doing it like him.
Tubbo stares at him, "That's not a question you should ever ask anyone."
"That's rude," Tommy grumbles, wrapping the blanket tighter around his frozen body. "I am offended, please leave as you have severely offended me. I am offended," He declares, offended.
Tubbo sighs, widening his eyes, "Can you please just take this? You'll feel better Tom."
What a dirty tactic. Truly disgusting that he would do such a horrible thing.
Tommy scowls, "Don't 'Tom' me you dick I'm not drinking that poison."
"Please? Big man?"
Damn him. Damn Tubbo to hell. The heathen.
"No," He argues.
"Big T?"
" ...No," He pouts.
"Tommy, you're so brave and courageous and cool. But to prove your ultimate strength, you need to drink this. It's the only way."
Now, Tommy knows that is bullshit.
Probably.
It's kind of bullshit?
Maybe.
...It may be bullshit.
He needs to prove his ultimate strength.
"Are you lying?" He mumbles, squinting his eyes at the teenager.
Tubbo shakes his head, "No lies here big man, I just wanna see how strong you are."
YOU ARE READING
TommyInnit's unbeatable method of avoiding sudden death
Fanfiction"I uh," Tommy starts, not knowing how to break this to the hero lightly. He hates to be the bearer of bad news. "I think your powers are broken? It's not a bad thing of course, but like, I swear you tried to mind control me and it like, totally fail...
