As Petals fall

Alone as many petals fall

It was strange, staring at a grave, wondering where it all went so very wrong. Jimmy was gone. It lifted some of the pressure he supposed, he wasn't constantly fighting to keep his husband alive. But Scott would have gone to the ends of the Earth for that man. It was as if he was stolen from him. The cyanette hadn't wanted this, hadn't wanted war. Yet Ren and his stupid Dogwarts wanted power, they had it. 

It was if he couldn't be in his own home, sat around the pond, enchanting, without the reminder of a presence no longer there. Jimmy had always been with him, from the beginning of the game until now, he had someone to talk to, prepare with, to love.

Scott wondered if that's why he felt so empty, why the golden bands he wore on his finger looked so dull. The magic wasn't there, not anymore. There wasn't the constant warmth or light, just coldness and dark remained in Jimmy's wake. He wondered if the blonde was watching, hovering above him, observing what must be a pitiful sight.

It was if time had stopped. Scott couldn't feel, he couldn't talk, all he could do was see the untouched remains of a life he had and sit; drown in his misery. It was as if all the fight, the anger, the revenge, the joy had seeped from his form, leaving nothing but a broken man with dreams no longer possible. 

It wasn't supposed to happen like it had. They would be the last two, maybe have Scar and Grian as well, Bdubs and Impulse also, just them to live in peace until one eventually went mad from the itch of a curse out of their control, end everyone else until it was the hobbits and the hobbits alone. Maybe they would have a proper wedding, find a villager to officiate them. Nothing rushed or urgent, just them and the world around them.

That wasn't possible. Not anymore. It probably never was.

Bdubs came after a while, alone and downcast. They sat at Jimmy's grave, talking fondly of their fallen partners.  Grief was something not to got through alone, and how ever much Scott yearned to isolate himself, call off whatever alliance he was and just make it through on his own, hide until the storm finally cleared, he couldn't. Not when Bdubs also needed that care, not when Scar and Grian had done everything to keep them both alive. He had loyalties. 

Plus, Jimmy would want him to carry on. 

So he did. If not for himself, if not for the war or Scar or Grian or the crastle folk. 

For Jimmy.

And who knows, maybe they would be reunited very soon.

The poppy wilted, lost half it's petals for half of a soul lost.

                                                       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2 more chapters and I can call this work as good as done my dudes! (you can tell I've been watching Martyn's Pov)

If you are going through something, don't be scared to say. Maybe not to an adult, but a friend, or me! I'm always here and would do anything I could to make you guys feel better!

Remember to eat, drink, sleep and take time for yourselves.

Tj xx