so good to me

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“nell, your hair looks crazy, please come here and let me braid” i'm currently watching elizabeth's children for like maybe the 10th time since i know her. she and her man are out of town for the weekend to attend a friend's wedding and that left me and billie in charge of nellie, arthur and george. they're precious and usually well behaved but just like any other toddler when they're tired, nellie is being a brat, not letting me braid her hair and when i try to touch her she just screams. and while i'm sure the neighbors think we're murdering her or something, billie has been keeping her cool the entire time and idk how. my stress levels are through the roof.

"if you don't let syd braid your hair, i'll take these back to the kitchen, hide them somewhere and then eat them all while you sleep" billie tells nellie, joining us all in the room nell shares with her twin, (yeah, arthur and nell are twins) and sends the 6 yr old a stern look while eating one of the cookies she grabbed from the plate she has in her hand.

"no no billie i promise i'll be good, i pinky promise" nellie says jutting out her bottom lip, literally looking like the embodimemt of pleading face emoji and that right there makes me forget for a second what a pain in the ass she was being not even 10 mins ago. i love her but it's the truth. sorry not sorry.

"ok ok, but stay being good and let syd braid your hair like a princess" the little girl nods in response and billie grabs her small hand in her free one, walking her to the bed so she can climb on it. i shake my head in disbelief because how on earth is someone this good with kids! "braid my hair like a princess, syd" nellie demands all cutely while sitting with her back facing me.

i chuckle, looking at billie and she just winks at me "it's call persuasion, mama" and it's she say before walking out of the room where i proceed to do some hair braiding while arthur and george are sat on the floor being completely distracted by some game billie downloaded on their ipad.

-

"they passed out so fast, thank god.." i say walking out of the twins' room and carefully closing the door behind me.

"was it hard to get george to fall asleep?" i ask billie since she had offered to tuck him in, read him a bedtime story and all.

"fuck no!" she chuckled, shoving her hands in the pockets of the white sweats she's wearing "my boy george over there is practically unconscious"

i immediately sent her a «that's not funny» look.

"i'm just kidding... relax. but no like he even passed out with the ipad in his hand. he's obsessed with the lil game i downloaded for them" billie says, feeling accomplished but i can't help but make a face because i mean.. i literally gave her one of my old phones to use a month ago, how does she know which games are so good to be getting anyone hooked this fast.

"i mean, as long as it doesn't mess up their sleeping schedule.." i say, shrugging.

"well.. i can't promise you that. i mean it's such a silly game, bro... like if you think about it, it's just silly but it's also really fucking cute and entertaining so i guess that's what makes it so addicting, i dunno"

uhhh... okay, that doesn't make much sense but who am i to judge! i've never been one to play games like that so i wouldn't know.

"that was like the first thing i downloaded when you gave me this bad boy" she says all cutely, waving the phone that once belonged to me in the air and then shoves it back in her pocket.

i roll my eyes playfully and was ready to say something but she cut me off.

"be lucky video games were the first thing i looked up and not porn" she blurts out and my immediate reaction is to smack her arm and drag her downstairs with me.

"what the hell, you can't be saying things like that" i scold her, probably sounding like a mom... or a prude. but if we're being honest, i do find it hot when she randomly speaks her mind and says those kinda things. will i ever tell her that? absolutely not!

"why not? you say it like it's sooo bad. like there's nothing wrong about wanting to see girls looking all fine scissoring and shit. i don't mind looking that up right now" once i see her hand reach inside her pocket for her phone, i smack her arm.. again, but she doesn't even budge.

"please, don't be acting like this here.." i sigh but she raises her eyebrows with an amused look plastered on her face.

"here, you say? sheesh okay.. i'll save it for when we're home" is all she says before licking her lips and disappearing into the kitchen.

god, i hate her sometimes

i don't

but torture is all i've known ever since she moved in with me. by torture i mean the way her real personality gradually started showing more and more each day, not like i have a problem with that. i'm literally fascinated by her and her mere existence, it's just how she went from a little scaredy cat to being a huge tease and loud, bold, sometimes stubborn person. that's what feels torturous, the teasing and bold part that is. you see, i'm all for her acting however she pleases and i know i'm gonna sound like a horn dog here but we live together and she's been in my life for a while now, how do you expect me not to feel frustrated when she's always looking so fine and teasing me the way she does. she knows i want her and i know damn well she wants me, now tell me why is it that all we do is cuddle and make out. i don't mean to sound ungrateful but.. don't tease if you can't please.

i can understand maybe she doesn't want all the commitments that come from being in a relationship, she's got abandonment issues and i got my own things i need to work on. we're not prepared to be dating. pretty hypocritical of me to say when we do a lot of couply things already. but the point is, we all deserve to have a little bit of fun even if we're not in a relationship. am i right or am i right?

you know what i mean by «fun»

"hello! earth to sydney, hello hello" i didn't even realized i had zoned out and even sat on the couch until billie spoke while waving her hands real close to my face like a crazy person.

it's funny so i simply chuckle and nod. "yes yes i'm here, obviously. i'm fine.. i was just thinking", "ok. thinking about what?" of course she'd ask.

did i ever mention she's also pretty nosy at times.

"about.. how you should dye your hair asap" i lie.. ish, she does need to dye her hair because she's constantly whining about how faded the teal is.

"fuuuuck, i knooow" she throw her head back then runs a hand through her hair, moving it a bit to the side. i love when she does that, i love when she does literally anything, so i just sit here and let her talk.

"shit's so faded. maybe i should dye it red or something, i dunno, i'll pick a color but you have to dye for me, please please.. i'll split my tips from the diner with you if you do it, please" she pouts, being all adorable just to convince me to say yes. i'm going to say yes either way but it gives me a serotonin boost watching her plead and be so cute.

"fine, i'll do it" i lean forward to peck her forehead before we both find a comfortable position for us to spoon on the couch.

"you're so good to me, syd..." she whispers in my ear from behind since she's being the big spoon and i just smile even if she can't see it. this soft side of her making me forget for a moment how bad i wanted her to be knuckle deep inside my... whatever

i choose to stay silent and focus on her warm breath hitting the back of my neck, it makes my body enter a state of much needed comfort and relaxation. i smile again when i feel her peck the back of my head. i know she says i'm her angel but little does she know she's my safe haven.

i will never regret anything i've done just to keep her around.

at least i hope i never have to.


*/

hi so i'm back and have lots of good ideas for this story,, idk if anyone is going to get invested in this but i hope anyone who reads safe haven enjoys the chapters. english is not my first language and i don't really proof read but i hope u like the story and feel free to comment ur thoughts and predictions <3

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