Ma Fille Chérie | Billie Eilish

quarante-quatre

a/n:

it feels like nobodys commenting anymoreee :((

update on the shit in the store situation;

we gave the police the cctv footage and they dealt with it thank fuck, my guy was fined and had to come back and clean it <333

but i was just neatening up our christmas section yesterday when i found a white elf with a brown smear on it. kms.

billie eilish, november 27th

los angeles | CA

"when's lilou gonna get here?" finneas asked, dealing with some loose wires on the speaker. "i dunno, hopefully soon, i want her to be here for soundcheck," i said looking around the large room. finn said it holds three hundred people at maximum capacity, and i think if it fills it would be my biggest crowd yet.

the thought was my anxiety spike, but also sending adrenaline coursing through my veins. 

the show was at nine pm tonight, and it wasn't even midday yet. but we had a lot of things to do to pass the time. connecting our speaker to the rooms in built sound system was our biggest issue currently. i told finneas it didn't matter if it didn't work, and the in built would work fine, but he knew me to well and was determined to make it work. 

i don't understand all the tech stuff, so i was just standing over his shoulder watching, wishing lilou was here to keep me entertained so i didn't get to anxious about tonight.

"billie!" 

when i didn't hear the thick french accent i felt disappointed but i turned around to the call anyway. claudia was making her way over to finneas and i, but it seemed like she was looking for me, and not for her boyfriend. "billie! hi! i've been looking for you like everywhere, i was just coming to ask finneas where you were but here you are, i guess no one expected you to be back here," claudia chuckled. 

"oh hey babe," finneas said looking up, "hey, just gonna steal billie for a little, cool?"

finn nodded and sent us both a close mouth smile before looking back down to the cords in front of him. claudia put her arm around me, and turned us to start walking out from backstage. "where are we going?" i asked. "i just wanna talk to you for a sec," she said taking me out onto the empty stage and sitting down at the front, dangling her legs over the edge. 

i tensed, immediately knowing where this conversation was going. claudia looked up at me, noticing i hadn't sat down. "don't panic, it's all good, sit down for me, i'll explain" she said looking at the way my face dropped and the way my foot had subconsciously stepped back, ready to leave.

i hesitantly lowered myself to the floor, putting my legs over the edge. "lilou told me you get really embarrassed and scared about ...this, which she did explain to me so i understand more now, but i'm not gonna talk for long and subject you to being uncomfortable, and i know since you probably don't wanna tell finneas about all this, and that's totally fine, but i was thinking maybe i could be your neutral?" claudia started, the way she was kind of rambling had me lost. 

i furrowed my brows in confusion, so she continued on. "well, i'm not a family member, and i don't live with you guys, so i was thinking i could be that neutral person for you to come to when lilou's not around? it can be to your terms and conditions, but i just want you to have someone when lilou's gone, it seems to be pretty hard to do anything in ...that realm when you don't have anyone." 

"oh," i said quietly, now understanding what she meant. "uhm, i don't know. i wanna think first" i mumbled, playing with the bottom of my shirt. "yeah, i thought so, just-" claudia was cut off by the stage door swinging open. we both quickly turned to the door, seeing lilou standing there out of breath, holding flowers, "where's billie?!" she suddenly blurted to the empty room making me laugh, "lilou!"