Ch. 34 - Like I Want You

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Like I Want You - Giveon

"Sometimes I wish you knew, But I disguise the truth, I say I'm happy but I'm still stuck on us, mm-mm-mm. Does your mind play this game too? Think 'bout me and you I guess I'll just pretend until it all makes sense."

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Y/N's POV

I finally stepped off the plane back in Tampa around 10pm and headed straight towards baggage claim. I popped my air pods in as I walked, bopping my head to Hozier's 'Would That I.'

Even when I was sad and feeling down, Hozier's voice always made me feel a little bit better.

As I waited for my suitcase to come by on the conveyor belt, I checked the messages on my phone and found one that Lizzie had sent while I was on the plane.

Smiling, I opened it up and read what she wrote

Liz: I could never forget you, Y/N. I adore you as well and I loved your note. It's now one of my most favorite things. Text me when you land, please.

Her message made me feel conflicting emotions. I was glad that she wouldn't forget me. That was one of my biggest fears leaving, honestly. She has such a big, beautiful, busy life that I was worried she wouldn't have time to think about me and I would just be someone she hooked up with a couple of times.

But, she never mentioned the actual poem. I was ready to choose her. I knew I liked her. I liked her a lot and I was ready to try it. That's what I was trying to tell her with that poem. If she felt the same, I wouldn't know.

Sighing, I typed back a message letting her know I made it back safely, grabbed my bag off the conveyor belt, and made my way to my car parked in long term parking.

—-

I walked to the door of my third floor apartment and reached for my keys that I shoved into my pocket as I was walking in. Fumbling with the keys, I unlocked the door and mindlessly made my way into my bedroom to drop my suitcase. I would deal with that another day. I went straight to the shower and cranked the water up to the hottest setting. As I undressed, I noticed the now barely visible bruises that were on my chest and smiled a small, sad smile.

I missed her so much already and the fact that I didn't know when I would see her again killed me. I was in so deep with her and I didn't know if she was in as deep as me. I mean, I knew she liked me. She made that much clear. But, is she in it for real, or just for the physical stuff? Does she just want to stay friends? Does she wonder the same thing?

I chuckled to myself as I stepped into the steaming shower. "We are not the best at communicating, are we?" I mumbled.

I let the water burn my skin and stood there thinking and not thinking at the same time. I felt really lost.

After finally coming back to myself and washing my hair and body, I stepped out and went into the bedroom to find some clothes and completely froze as I looked at the space. In my now aware state, I noticed that there were a ton of things missing.

What the hell happened?

Standing frozen for a couple of minutes, I started taking note of every space in the room that was now unoccupied that wasn't before. The TV that was on the dresser was gone, the closet was halfway open with a ton of things missing, then it hit me...

I asked Kevin to come get his things while I was out of town. All of his stuff was... gone.

I felt a wave of sadness hit me. It hit me fucking hard and I fell to my knees and felt the tears well up in my eyes. Just to be clear, I wasn't sad for the failed marriage and Kevin leaving. That shit was meant to happen. I am 100% sure of that.

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