Girl's Love | Editing |

Chapter 2

I woke up at 4am the next morning. No, I'm not insane. It was not of my own volition. It's just that my brain decided I had enough sleep and now needed to be alert. You know, because I was sharing a room with my sister now.

Thankfully, Amber was still asleep. She looked peaceful; it was a stark contrast to how chaotic it felt to be around her. It was hard to remember that she was a kid, too. Well, she was eighteen, but still young.

I took advantage of her slumber to get dressed. Afterwards, I grabbed my journal and snuck into the kitchen. I wrote until my siblings' alarms went off. That was my cue to make breakfast for myself and Neal. Amber was usually set with a hot pocket.

Neal emerged from his room, rubbing his eyes. His hair was so messy that it rivaled an anime character's (not that my brother would appreciate this comparison). He wore blue striped pajama pants and no shirt. 

"Morning," he mumbled as he sat at the kitchen table.

"Good morning," I replied, handing him his cereal.

Amber came out fully dressed as soon as I sat down. The three of us said our obligatory "good mornings," complete with lack of eye contact. Then, as per usual, Amber left when she was done with the microwave, leaving Neal and I to talk.

"So... how bad was last night?" Neal asked in a faint voice.

I shrugged. "Not too bad, surprisingly. She actually talked to me."

Neal looked up from his bowl. His eyes widened. "Seriously?!"

"Well, it was mostly about my room. Nothing special."

"Oh..." 

The interest in his voice was quickly replaced with disappointment. I somehow managed to forget his relationship with Amber was just as strained as mine was. Guilt washed over me for killing his hopes like that. I quickly added more.

"But, uh... she did answer me when I asked about what colleges she was thinking of. TCNJ, Hartford, and Arcadia."

"TCNJ is close, isn't it?"

"Yeah, about 20 minutes away."

"Guess we know which one she isn't choosing."

I wanted to tell him not to say that. But it was true. He was only twelve, and he knew we were messed up beyond repair. Twelve. There was nothing I could do to change his mind, to convince him that things could change.

Nothing I could do to fix us.

"Well, if she starts anything, you can always stay in my room," Neal spoke up, wiping milk from his face with a napkin.

I stared down at my empty bowl and smiled. "Thanks, but I can handle it."

I wasn't sure whether I was trying to assure Neal or myself.

***

Since Uncle Erik had to work early, it was up to us to get ready in the morning. That meant we had to take the bus on time, or we'd be screwed.

Amber and I obviously rode the same bus, since we both went to high school. But she would grab a seat in the back, while I'd sit in the front. As per usual, I had my earphones in within the first minute. Today, I had chosen to listen to some Counting Crows.

I looked over what I had written this morning. Something was bothering me... yeah, I could cut some of those words. And this line sounds off; it'd sound better like... I took a pen and made my edits.

This was my normal routine until I got to school. Then I'd meet up with my friends, and Amber would with hers. We'd talk and then head to class.

In homeroom, I noticed a classmate donning a Montclair University sweater. So did my friends, apparently.