A Necessary Journey

Rewind

As soon as he got home, Omer dropped his bags at the front door, striding to the kitchen and pouring himself a large glass of whisky. He threw the first one back, emptying the glass in one go before pouring another and stalking into the garden.

Here he was again, right back where he was six months ago, without Defne and hurting. As though someone had hit the rewind button on his life. Playing only the worst and most hurtful scenes over and over again. 

He'd had a lot of time to think on the way home, a lot of time to come to terms with the state of his life. Love was no longer an option for him, how could anyone experience a love so big, and then be able to get over it? It was impossible. Maybe in time he would meet someone he could respect and care for, but love? His heart would never be capable of cutting Defne out of it.

He had to get on with his life, for the sake of his child, the company, Sinan. Downing the last of the contents of his glass, he placed the glass on the table and turned, heading up the stairs to get changed and get some sleep. He had to try to forget that he'd lost the single most amazing thing to ever have happened to him. 

A month passed, Omer had thrown himself into his work, determined to become the Omer he'd been before the feisty, warm redhead had entered his life. He was distant, closed off, depressed. He started his mornings at 530 am, throwing himself back into his gruelling fitness regime again, he drove Derya to the point of exhaustion, the designers were on the verge of quitting and he demanded perfection from everyone around him.

The only difference in his life was Sonia and the life growing inside of her. They met a couple of times a week for lunch, to discuss how things were going and if she was concerned that he failed to eat whatever he ordered during their catch ups, she didn't raise it. She seemed to understand her place in his life, and that suited him fine. Omer still couldn't understand why he felt no connection to his child, why when he looked at Sonia, he felt nothing but indifference. But then, he honestly couldn't bring himself to care. Food tasted bland, everything around him seemed grey and lifeless. He knew that he was on the verge of needing to speak to a professional, but he was sure he could battle through it himself. 

It was on one of the days that he was supposed to meet Sonia, that everything changed. Running late due to a last minute meeting, Omer had called her to advise that he'd be an hour late, that he'd meet her at the restaurant. Realising minutes before he went into the meeting that asking an eight month pregnant woman to make her own way was insensitive and impractical for her, he quickly called Sukru, sending the driver to pick her up.

He thought nothing more of it until he was leaving the office, frowning when he saw Sukru waiting for him at the car.

"Sukru? Did you pick up Sonia?"

Sukru looked troubled but nodded. "I did."

Shrugging, Omer slid into the open door held by the driver and pulled his phone out, checking his emails and messages as the driver clambered in and set off. They'd been driving for quarter of an hour before Omer finally looked up and noted that they were headed out of the city.

"Sukru? We're supposed to be meeting Sonia."

Sukru avoided his employer's eyes and stared straight ahead. "There was a change of plans, Sir. We need to head to the house."

"Did something happen, is the baby okay?" Sukru ignored the question and took the turn for Omer's neighbourhood. "Sukru!"

"Please Sir. I'll explain. Just let me get us home first."

Dread filled Omer, Sukru would never intentionally avoid a question. Something was wrong. Oh god, was it Defne? Had he heard news about her? Before he had time to speculate further, the car was pulling into the drive, Sukru hopping out.