Shepherds past life

part 30

TW- mentions of self-harm and cursing in this chapter

Amelia's POV
A couple of hours have passed Mia is still in the same place she hasn't moved at all I tried to talk with her but she just tells me to leave her alone or doesn't talk. "hey the girls were just asleep so I left them with jo she is watching them" Arizona told me as she was walking over to me

I could hear her but I just couldn't look at her all I was thinking about was Mia and how she is hurt "melia..Ames" I heard Arizona say then she snapped her fingers in my face which had brought me back "yeah sorry" I said "ames what's wrong" she asked me "nothing I'm fine" I told her trying to play it off "no you're not I'm going to talk to Mia" she told me but that's the last thing I need her to do "no Arizona don't" I told her pulling her arm back

"then tell me you're ok" she said "fine whatever I'm ok" I told her she gave me a look "just please don't go and talk to her" I added "fine I won't" she told me "thank you" I told her then we both went different ways

Arizona's POV
Yeah I know I should listen to Amelia but both of them aren't fine I could tell because melia gets like when something or someone is hurting or going through something and the fact that Mia still hasn't talked to her which is making me believe something is wrong

after we went our ways I walked down to the conference room Mia was in I walk in and she is still in the chair facing away from the door "go away Amelia" she said "not her" I said then I heard a long sigh coming from her

"you too go away" she told me "not until you talk to me or melia" I told her I walked over to her sitting in the next chair by her she had her hands in fist which made me wonder they were also slightly red like her whole hand was
red "can I see your palms" I asked her "what no" she told me starting to get defensive "open them" I told her "why I have nothing" she told me "ok then open them" I told her

"Arizona leave me alone" she told me "you think I'm stupid don't you" I told her "I never said that" she told me "why are you doing that again" I asked her "shut up and leave" she told me then she dropped her phone which she had to pick up from off the floor when she went to go get her phone the inside of her palms were bleeding like really bad "Mia you need to bandage those up" I told her then she got up from her chair "no shut up I have bandaids" she told me walking to the door "don't say a fucking word about this to Amelia or anyone don't even tell her we talked" she told me before slamming the door and walking out leaving me alone.

Mia's POV
I'm so pissed right now it's not even a word I could even use everything and everyone is just making me so mad. first Jackson comes in with his bullshit and now Arizona knows what the hell I did and she is probably going to tell Amelia about everything because it's Arizona.

I look down at my palms they were bleeding I could tell I needed stitches but no because then it would just lead to more questions. I walk down to the supply closet and find some bandages and wrap my hands around them so I could control the bleeding for now.

I walk out to find April "hey everyone is looking for you" she told me "I'm fine I just needed to breathe a little" I told her then I saw her eyes move over to my hands "what happened to your hands" she asked me "I fell scratched them up not a big deal" I told her lying she just nodded then walked away

I'm not going to lie these cuts are starting to hurt but the last thing I need in my body is some type of drug or alcohol but they hurt like really bad so that might have to be an option for me plus they aren't properly taken care of.

the last person I needed to see right now is Amelia she is going to ask all these questions and she is probably mad right now. i walk down to my office to just take a breath from everything going on I look down at my cuts and they're bleeding through the wraps like crazy

"oh fuck me" I said I walked back out of my office trying not to be spotted by anyone but I see the blonde again this time she stopped me
"what the hell do you want Arizona" I asked her "you need to go get those fixed" she told
me "shut up why're you so worried about me" I asked me "because you're being dumb" she told me "you know what you can do" I told her "what" she said "go get me something to stop the pain" I told her "I can't do that" she told me "and why the fuck not" I told her "because you can't have a simple conversation without going off on someone" she told me "whatever I'll go get them myself" I told her walking right past her.

Amelia's POV
It's been hours me and the girls are now home and I haven't heard anything from Mia I was sad but now I'm just mad. I have been leaving calls and messages and I get nothing back from her it's like I'm a ghost to her or something I don't know what to do when this happens when she just disappears for some time without literally saying anything to me at all

I just had put the girls down for bed then I hear the door open I walk to the living room and it's her i was just watching at what she was doing I had one of the girls toys in my hand so I threw it at her and it hit her head. "what the fuck dude" she said rubbing her head "oh so I'm dude now" I said she just looked at me I threw another toy at her "what the hell Mia" I said "stop throwing toys at me" she said that just made me even more mad because she can't even explain why she is so late home.

I threw everything I possibly could at her she made me so mad "I'm going to try not and yell at you because the girls are sleeping but what the hell dude" I said to her then she walked over to me I noticed she had bandages on her hands she didn't have that before "what the hell happened to your hands" I asked her walking over to her "nothing" she told me "you can't call me or at least send a message to me" I told her "I didn't talk to anyone" she told me but she doesn't know that I know that her and Arizona had a little talk

"so you didn't talk to Arizona and April" I told her "fucking hell" she said under her breath "no tell me why talk to them and not your the mother of your children? your children mia!" I said "it was just a few words babe" she told me "no you don't get to call me babe" I told
her "whatever Amelia" she said walking over to the kitchen "you make me so mad I swear" I
said "then stop talking to me Amelia" she told me I couldn't stop looking at her hands what the hell happened to her hands

"show me your hands" I asked her "no" she said going to sit down on the kitchen table "please I just want to know if you're ok" I told her now I had tears in my eyes all I wanted to know if she was ok that's all It was silent for a while then I heard her she was taking off her bandages I walked over to her sitting in the chair next to her I grabbed her hands softly and unwrapped her hands she just had cuts and blood everywhere

"come" I told her she followed me into our room where I keep the medical kit for us or the girls I walk into the bathroom so we can wash off the blood first during the whole process of me cleaning off her wounds she was just staring into space or looking at me "all done" I told her "Ames" she said "please don't we can talk about this in the morning" I told her walking out the room into our guest room I'm honestly both mad and sad but I'm mostly sad at everything that went on today.

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A/N
this chapter is kinda harsh on them both I just realized as reading back