38: haywire

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Traitor - Olivia Rodrigo

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Traitor - Olivia Rodrigo

***

Cameron

"Are you double crossing me, Varron?" I asked with him a blank expression on my face.

Please say no, please. I whispered in my mind because if he admit that he does, I will surely die.

He was confused for a second then proceeded to lean closer to me and held my cheek, slowly caressing it. The wind from the open car window on my left blew. I love that look in his eyes, if only I didn't knew.

"Cam, hurting you will be last thing I would ever do. You'll always be safe in my arms." he whispered and claimed my lips. I closed my eyes, as a single tear escaped. I know you do, so why did you? But no words came out of my mouth, I didn't have the strength in me to confront him. I couldn't say what I wanted to say. I wanted to ask him, why? Why did you do that? Why did you? Of all people, why you?

When he finally freed my lips, he placed a kiss on top of my head then made sure to fix my seatbelt. When he did, he went back to his seat and started the car's engine.

I have always wanted to go on a trip with only him. I have always dreamed of it but why, why when it's already happening, why am I hurting? Why didn't it feel as good as I have thought? Why is it breaking my heart every second I spend him with? Alone, in this car, with nothing but passing cars and silent villages to see? How did we come to this?

My phone beeped so I tore my gaze from Varron and took out my phone. I gripped my phone harder when I saw the picture that was sent to me. I stared at the picture long and hard before looking at Varron who's busy driving.

Why her?

*** 

Throughout the outing, I didn't feel an ounce of happiness. It was pure torture to me. But Varron looked carefree. He's having fun, but why am I not? Ako ang nagpumilit sa kanya na mag-outing. Because I wanted to spend time with him. But why....why am I not happy? Why do I feel like tearing up everytime I see that damn smile of his. Why am I hurt thinking that he also smiled at her like that. That smile is mine! Only mine!

"Cameron?" he called my name in a worried manner. I stared at his face, not showing any remorse. So, he's just going to play dumb? Pretending that nothing's wrong? Like he didn't do anything? 

"Hey, what's wrong?" that really sound hypocrite coming from him, I wanted to tell him that but I kept quiet. I swallowed all the words I wanted to tell him. Because I know that the moment I say those words, everything, as in everything we have will be lost. And I have lost enough, so I'll play the fool while he's the cruel man I would cry at night for. 

"Aron, don't you dare forget the vow you took. You can't leave me, remember? Because if you do, I will kill you myself." I said with a sweet smile. I saw how fear crossed his eyes for a second but he managed to cover it up with a smile. 

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