Help

three

F L O R E N C E

This is so awkward. My brothers are now strangers. I guess they could say the same about me.

After my interaction with Dominic my spirits lifted quite a bit. He was how I remembered him. He is still welcoming and bubbly, he still talks with his hands, and he still plays hockey. The only thing different about him is his appearance. He is way taller, probably reaching around six feet. His face is more sculpted and less chubby than I remember, and he grew his hair out quite a bit that now shows off his curls.

Lucien looks the same, just older. He has ear piercings and a stud on the right side of his nose. The few tattoos he has that are visible the ones on his hands and neck. He stares at me with an unreadable expression. He doesn't seem excited for my return, instead a bit unnerved, like my presence is wrong. He's someone who I am going to choose to stay away from, just like Massimo.

Emilio sits across from me with a small welcoming smile on his face. He hasn't said anything to me yet but from the way he looks at me— like I am still his sister, calms me and lets me know he does want me here. Emilio hasn't changed much either, he has a beard now which is shocking but also fitting.

Their forks make clanking noises as they eat their food. Although everyone's eating, the awkwardness is as clear as air. When I am not looking around at them I feel their eyes on me, watching my every movement like I am an animal trapped in a zoo enclosure. That's what it feels like at least. Maybe it's in my head, but I feel as though they are critizing my every movement, watching to see when I will mess up or break. Lifting my spoon is a great task when the fear of them judging me rests on my mind. I cannot breath. The air is being sucked out of the room every time one of their eyes land on me.

I probably don't help with the stares because I sit here as though I am a rigid statue. Of course they're going to stare, the only time I move is when their burning gaze's aren't on my anxious figure. My hands shake slightly from the nerves and my foot taps under the table only further showing just how uncomfortable I am.

"Is there something wrong with your food?" Lucien sneers, across from me. I feel my whole body go still as I use all the courage I have to lift my head and meet his gaze. His eyes are like fire, he looks at me with anger.

"Lucien be nice." Emilio glares at him before sending me an apologetic look. I look down at my hands resting in my lap. I scratch at the skin next to my thumb until I there is a slight sting. I bite my lip until I taste blood.

I don't want to be here. I don't want to be here. I don't want to be here.

Under their scrutinizing gazes I feel so uncomfortable. These aren't the boys I once called my big brothers. They make me nervous and feel unwanted. Even though Dominic showed me kindness maybe he had done it out of pity. But even if his kindness was misplaced, he may be my only way out of this dinner.

So looking up from my lap I meet his eyes. They soften at my look. I give him a desperate look, hopefully getting my message across. His eyes widen. "Would you like to leave?" He asks calmly. Nodding my head, I wait for permission. Picking up all the courage I have I look to Massimo waiting for his answer.

"You can go." Standing up I go to grab my plate but am stopped by Massimos hand. "We will do it."

Giving them an unsure nod I leave the table and speed walk to my room. The turns in the hallways are still the same. I don't get lost. It's easy to navigate my way towards my room and sure enough, I am in my room in no time.

Closing the door and turning the lock I can't decide how I should spend the rest of my evening. Knowing that I don't have much to do anyways I decide that sleep is ultimately my best and only option.