Thanatophobia| MICHAEL AFTON x READER

31| Sugar Pink, liquor, lips

before we start...this song also makes me think of Michael

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1st person Michael POV

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Y/N fell asleep before I did, which isn't surprising. I ended up moving to the other side of the bed to finish watching the movie I put on- They didn't seem to enjoy it, so I put in on low volume since I didn't own any earbuds. 

Im not on my phone often, and when I am, it's usually just to watch videos. I usually do that when I eat, which is why Y/N sometimes calls me a..."Ipad kid" I'm not sure what that means. I didn't have any technology growing up unless I was at work. 

I space out for a moment. My eyes are focused on Christine. Her hair was long, brown, and really curly. Her skin was white and porcelain(Depending on which one you watch), and her dress was long, white, and beautiful. The way she and the Phantom danced made my stomach feel weird. The phantom was tall with short, slicked-back brown hair. Half of his face was covered with a mask due to the chandelier accident. 

I know it's weird to enjoy operatic music, but the way the duo delivers it is...beautiful. Christine belts notes like it's nothing, and I admire that. Phantom of the Opera is a movie I can watch over and over again and never get tired of it. 

Then a notification pops up at the top of my screen. The only person I have in my phone is Y/N and an old contact from my mother, so I swipe it away, only reading the end of the tagline, which was "Your area!" I thought it was weird. 

--

it was 1 am when the movie finally ended. I sat up slowly, the covers falling down onto my lap as I swiped through my phone one last time.  I finally got to look at that notification, which was buried under all of my game notifications. I play Cats and Soup, which is a game about cats cooking soup. I like it, makes me hungry for cats and soup. 

Once those were all swiped away, I was met with a very weird-looking lady with very large breasts with big red words that said "HOT MOMS LOOKING TO MEET UP IN YOUR AREA" I almost screamed and threw my phone. 

I screamed, but I managed to keep my phone on the bed at least. This woke Y/N up. 

'Who needs killing?!" They shouted instantly, turning to me with their fists up. I thought for a moment that they were going to start swinging at me...thankfully, their face softened when they saw my TERRIFIED expression. "What happened?" They asked quickly. 

I pointed to my phone, which was face-up on the bed about a foot in front of me from being tossed. I watched as they leaned over and picked up the phone, staring at that ginormous pair of boobs for longer than I ever could. 

"Since when do you get porn ads?" They laughed a bit louder than I would have wanted them to. "Since when do you watch porn? Is that why you were in the loo for so long earlier? Is that why you wanted me to leave?" They laughed again.

"No!" I said quickly, snatching my phone from their hands and swiping the notification away. "I don't watch porn! Well- I did once! But that was a while ago!" I defended, tossing my phone onto the bed once more. "I don't need porn." 

"You got boobs in your inbox, mate." They giggled, covering their mouth as they picked my phone back up. "well, nit really. you don't even have my boobs in your inbox...but irrelevant." 

"I don't want to ask for them..." I said softly, slouching down onto the bed. 

"I know. I know, you're a good guy, Mikey, im just joking around." They sighed, setting my phone down and laying back down, this time against me. I put my arm around them and they leaned their head onto my chest. 

I always get self-conscious when they do that, but they never complain, so I don't either. 

"Darling." I cleared my throat. "Sorry for waking you." 

"It was for a good cause, Mikey, it's okay." They laughed again. "Scared of boobs...I remember the look you had when you first saw mine. Thought you would die." 

"Haahh..hah yeah..." I laughed with them, clearing my throat afterward. I felt awkward. I repositioned myself, which made Y/N move slightly as well. "I don't like staring-" 

"You stare all the time." 

"I meant like-"

"You like watching my undress, Mike." They laughed. "You don't have to deny it." 

"Im sorry im a pervert...." 

"You arent a pervert Mike- Im not saying hat-" 

"Im awful-"

"No, mike-" 

"Im sorry, you must hate me-" 

"Mike, no-" 

"Im horrible..." 

"Why are you crying? Mike, what's going on?" They looked confused and slightly concerned...Why am I crying? I don't know, I just am. Can I stop? No...im trying though. 

"I don't know." My voice cracked. I huffed when I heard them giggling. It isn't funny. 

"Did you upset yourself?" They asked cooly, now rubbing my arm with their hand. I huffed again. "I didn't mean for it to come off that way- Im just making jokes, Mikey." 

"Sorry, I know." I sighed deeply, rubbing my eyes with the balls of my hands. "Im emotional today, I haven't got a clue why." 

"You're not on your period, right?" 

"What..." I squinted my eyes, cringing at the question. "No- love, im not a girl..." 

"Again, Mikey, a joke." 

"Oh..." 

"You'll get it sooner or later." They sighed, laying back down. They pulled me by my arm so I laid down beside them, face to face. "You're easy to pick on." 

"I just can't read tones very well." 

"I can tell." 

I turned around to face away from them...my shoulders trembled for a moment, and I was still rubbing my eyes with the balls of my hands. I felt their hands on my neck, rubbing circles on the small. It felt like they were drawing squiggles up my spine, which made me shiver. 

When I finally turn back around to look at them, they smile at me. I get a moment to stare at them...Even if they didn't think highly of themselves, I still truly can't find one single thing I dislike. I know we have our arguments, and our disputes, and our conflict, but we always end up making up after. The nights where I get to lay in bed with them, hold them, kiss them, touch them. It makes me feel weird inside. 

This was one of those moments where no one had to say anything. 

"Kiss me," I said. They do.

When they finally kiss me, everything goes oddly quiet, like the moment of silence between lightning and thunder. One Mississippi. Two Mississippi. Three Mississippi. Four Mississippi. Five Mississippi.

bang. 

they're everywhere up my back and over my arms and suddenly they're kissing me harder, deeper, with a fervent urgent need. It wasn't sexual, but a sugary, passionate kiss that made my hands grip into their hair, pulling their head closer to mine as if we weren't already out of breath. I'm not gonna make it out to be something that it wasn't: It was perfect-- Their soft lips against the bite of the sugar still on my tongue- 

We pull away for a moment, Y/N gasping for a second to breathe. A moment to think. Their hands were at the side of my face, mine in their hair. For a moment, we stare at each other again. 

"I love you," I say. 

We kiss again. The next kiss is the kind that breaks open the sky. It steals my breath and gives it back...

it gives me hope that, maybe, my life doesn't have to be so bad. 

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