The three frenemies blasted into space in a massive ball of energy. They were all terrified, but they knew they had to stay strong or it could effect Spread and Malfunction's powers.
When they landed on the moon, Milkshake and Eet prepared to fight Effeminate but were surprised to find that he had other plans.
"I'm not here for a battle of powers, but rather, a battle of rap" Embyro said.
"You're challenging us to a rap battle?" Ear asked.
"Yes that's what I just said you stupid dumb poophead" Immunity snapped.
"Hey, don't talk to him like that" Meataballa said, then wondered why he was so defensive over Egg all of a sudden.
"Whatever. Today I kidna—have with me, 3 of the best rappers humanity has ever known to judge each of our performances" Feminine gestured to the judges: Lint Manual Merengue, Kyle Josef twenty one pilot, and Pitbull.
"There will be 3 rounds. You'll each get to go up against me, which means 3 chances for one of you to take my place as the worlds greatest rapper. So give it everything you've got" Employee said.
First round was Economics vs. Jenuine. Jared was super nervous, but Milkshake gave him a kissa smoocha, which gave him the confidence to do anything.
A backing track began to play...somehow, and Aluminum began to rap.
"Jensen Ackles more like ankles, they look so ugly in your sandals, I'll blow your mind like birthday candles, wish I could change your face like tv channels. Got no fame after supernatural. You're irrelevant, when I win you won't hear the end of it, so I think you should just call it quits."
Mike drop.
Journalism began to sweet in his astornauts uniform. He really felt like an astronaut in the ocean rn. But he looked over at his hubby, and he picked up the michaelphone, and took a deep breast.
"Eminem...more like eminahhh, we only just met, but I'm already tired of ya. You think that you can beat me? Well that's real funny. Because I'm jopping to success just like a bunny-"
"Bunnies hop, not jop" Enderman interrupted.
Jankle was so humiliated. How could Epipen ruin his performance like that!! He tried to pick up where he left off, but it was too late. His rap was ruined and he was disqualified. He walked back over to Tacklechore and Echo sadly.
"I'm so sorry guys, I let you down" Jeanshorts said as tears flowed down his checks but he had an astronaut helmet on so you can't see it.
"Hey, it's okay, we still have 2 more chances to beat him!" Maplesyrup comforted him.
Next up it was Elk's turn to rap against Effervescent.
"Ed Sheeran, more like Ed Pee-Man. You little piss baby, gonna cry to your mommy? And you should take a shower cuz you smell like salami. Just served you up like pastrami on a nice little plate. And I'll let you in on a secret, I know your red hair is fake" EmilyElizabeth rapped.
"My hair is NOT fake!" Etc. stomped his little feet and yanked the mic from Sam-I-Am's hand.
His streak of confidence quickly ended though as soon as he had to start wrapping.
"Uh...uhhhh....ummm....theclubisn'tthebestplacetofindaloversothebar-"
Exit was disqualified.
Finally it was down to the final showdown: Eggsandham vs. MacBook.
Embezzlement went first.
"Two down, one to go, this is easy peezy. If you think you stand a chance by now, well that is pretty cheesy. We both know that I'm the best, so there's no use in even trying. You've loved girls since pre-k? Well, we all knew that you were lying."
"Homophobia? That isn't cool. Just makes you look like a giant fool. But I'm gay so I can be homophobic too, I know Elton John shares cock rings with you. Open up that closet door. Hating me won't make him love you more" Mockingfloor rapped.
"Finally, some actual competition" Mr. Worldwide said.
"You both gave some pretty sick as frick performances, frens. Stay alive |-/" Tile Joestar said.
"Wë wêrē mærrięd thåt ñįght" Sin Handtowel Banana said.
The judges talked amongus themselves for a few moments, before coming to their conclusion:
Macrophage won the battle!!!
He jopped up and down and ran over to hug Tension and Exe.
"I love you both so much!" he cried.
"B-both of us?" EdEddandEddy asked.
"Uh...we'll unpack that later" Unpacklemore said.
"NO! This has to be a mistake! We all know I'm the greatest rapper who ever lived! Judges! Give us the real results!" Remnant threw a tantrum.
"Those were the real results you among us sussy ball" Peetbüll said.
"Jealousy isn't the way bro" Tiger Toesniff said.
"*bites lip*" said Lovewins Superhell Montana.
"Fine, then you give me no choice" Man2man said, his hands beginning to glow with great energy.
MackleCore and Eff prepared to fight him when—
"Stop!" a voice said.
Holy shit Eldon Jont????
"Sir Elton Hercules John???" everyone gasped in unison.
"Yes, it is I" he said.
"How did you get here??" Jenguin (Jenson Penguin) asked.
"You needn't worry about that, young mortal. All of you, step aside. I can handle this troubled gentleman" Elon said.
"Elfkin it's...it's been so long" Jeminem (Jean Eminem) said, his pupples dilating.
"Oh, Emerald, what have you become? This is not who you are. This is not the man I shared so many years with, shared friendship with, shared cock rings with. Why are you doing this?" Ellen asked.
"Because I—I still love you Skeleton" Eminent sobbed.
"I know. But you have to let me go. You deserve to find happiness" Felt bin said.
Eponym fell to the ground and sobbed inconsolably.
Elbow helped him up. "Don't you know—"
"I'm still standing" Evanescence finished.
"Besties?" Elmo asked.
"Besties for life" Lemon M. said.
They both pulled their matching bestie cock rings out of their pockets and held them up. And all of a sudden, they vanished into a cloud of magic.
"What the fuck is ever going on" Jealousy said.
"Hey um...so seeing what went down between L. Ton and Element made me realize...thats what I've been to you guys innit. A villain who can't get over his feelings for someone. And that's a rather bit cringe innit. So I reckon I should apologize and say, from this moment forward, you will never see me again. I will leave you alone now. Toodle pip" Edmoji said.
"Eczema wait!" Merman stopped him.
"Yes?" Editorial said.
"We uh. We kinda can't leave the moon without you" Manhood said.
"Oh..." Edelweiss said.
"But also...Jergens and I have something we want to say..." Marvel cinematic universe said.
"Over the course of this trip, we've become closer and..." Gen Z said.
"Eel...would you like to be in a polycule with us?" Manifesting said.
"Oi! Shiver me timbers! There's nothing I'd love more!" Eggo said.
The 3 of them took turns kissing each other on the moon before hugging tightly and blasting off.
True love really can if you keep on being the yes.
