Invader Zim x Reader Oneshots/Headcannons (Indefinite Haitus)

'Funky Alien' Zim x Non-binary reader

Requested by me!

This is an au where Zim comes to Earth in Highschool, rather than elementary, since it is cannon that he is 160 which is 16 in irken years, so i thought that that would be more appropriate, as well as making Dib more mature. They are always in highschool, I just keep forgetting to point it out.

The air was crisp and cool, it was a nice fall day. You hadn't expected a new student to appear in your classroom one day. Especially a weird ass green alien dude. Like wth, where did he come from!?

Heading to skool for your normal routine because you're not the new kid and that's a cliché. Opening the door to the classroom, looking at the demon teacher that could literally send children to HELL, Ms. Bitters, because who needs love when you look like an old crone with long ass fingers.

Heading to your seat by the window, because you're a protagonist, next to Dib. You sat down, taking out your notebook, which was filled with previous lectures of your eminent doom and evident stupidity of the entire human race.

Dib and (Reader) were friends, to say the least. (Reader) would go on monster hunts in the woods, even finding bones (and keeping them). They would even help with Dib's creation and buying of paranormal anomaly finding objects and machines.

Looking to the front, they had spaced out and were looking like they were stoned out of their mind, they were snapped out of it when a little green funky looking alien dude burst in.

He walked to the front and the teacher introduced him.

"Class, I would like to introduce, the newest, hopeless appendage to the student body. His name is Zim." She paused for a moment before saying," Zim, if you have something to say, say it NOW. Because after this moment, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER SOUND FROM YOU."

You swore to the Gods you could hear rattle snakes,

"Hello friends, I am a perfectly normal human worm baby! You have noooothing, absolutely nothing to fear from me, just pay no attention to me, and we'll get along just fine."

"Take your seat Zim. Today's lecture is about outer space and how it will eventually implode in on itself!"

Everyone went quiet for a moment before Zim's hand shot up, who, was sitting across the room.

"Yes Zim?" Ms. Bitters questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"In the event of say, a full scale alien invasion, how prepared do you think this planet's defenses would be? Tell me."

Naw dude, this guy is on crack cocaine or some shit, like bro, he did not ask that. Like bro you would have to smoke so much weed for your skin to be green and your eyes to be PURPLE. This fucker's eyes looked like he smoked so much weed for a second man.

"As I was saying, the universe is just doomed. Doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed..." This bitch was nuts. They had stopped listening to her drone on after the fifth 'doomed'. Their friend Dib turned to them and looked them in the eyes and whispered," This guy is totally an alien my guy." "No shit." They replied.

The day passed on to lunch, the only time they didn't have to Judie Foster everyone's bullshit. (I got that from Katya and Trixie from Unhhh, go watch it, its good, its on yt, yes I am a gay stereotype.) They always brought a packed lunch, because hope was lost that the school food was good. It was just shit on a plate, but they never knew when shit was orange.

Sitting next to Dib, and opening their lunch, they ate what they had and talked with him while making jokes and shit like that.

"Okay, but Dib, I'm sorry but, that picture of James Charles bald that you sent me was a hate crime in itself you asshat."