Soul not Included

Chapter 105

Simon was gone the next morning and I couldn't go check if he was just downstairs on the couch just as Dad wanted him to be or if he had gone back to the studio to make sure Dorian was okay... which I suppose wasn't likely. I couldn't go check, reason being, my body feels like shit. I don't remember our first time very well, the details of that night were blurred and mostly just altogether forgotten due to the bigger events. The death, mostly. That death probably has the biggest root in my heart than anything else that year... but I at least remember that it had hurt to move every muscle of my body, which is why I did so gladly at the time. This time was a little different. I was at least able to move before. Maybe that says something about Bella's pain tolerance and this bodies tolerance. This one might be a bit more sensitive. Which makes me curious to how well Bella's body would have handled being tased. This body didn't do too bad on that, i think.

I frowned... then doesn't that mean that Simon was being more violent with me than a taser?

I try to look down and I know that the covers are a fucking mess. Maybe Simon has less willingness to be careful this time around. Maybe he really wanted to drill it home that the memory is between him and me and no one else. I'm not sure how I should take that.

I'm not sure about a good many of things. 

Did I do the right thing? Sleeping with Simon, i mean. I could have forgiven him without doing this... I definitely jumped the gun. I groaned but I still couldn't move to cover my face. I'm sure he's not having any second thoughts about this. Simon is always so sure in his actions. Even when he isn't completely sure about anything else, he has confidence in what he does. He never does anything half assed. 

I admire and am envious of his confidence in himself.

I have to pee, I thought bitterly, trying with ever fiber of my being to roll off the bed. I had to check the damages. I had to wash the blankets before dad gets back. I have to—

Simon waltzed in. I thought he was gone.

He smirked at my direction before taking a seat next to me. He seemed lively for someone that was practically dragging his feet. How many days has he been up during the day now? He'd probably stay up for every day to come if he thought that was for the best.

"Eat," he demanded and shoved a piece of orange in my mouth. I did as he wanted.

"I need to pee."

"Hold it in." He said handing me another slice.

I groaned. "Laundry."

"I'll do it once Sue leaves the perimeter," he answered quickly and fed me another.

"... have you been up to make sure they didn't come in here?"

"If you know. They don't hate me but they would if they know i feed off you whenever I have the chance."

I groaned again, trying really hard to sit up. A futile effort. I huffed out exhausted. "Do you still have problems hunting?" I asked vaguely remembering him mentioning that before.

"No. But i don't like it all the same. It's messy."

"The Cullens are neat eaters."

"The Cullens haven't spent years as an animal. I do not eat with finesse. I eat to devour."

"Noted."

"Speaking of, you've no physical injury despite how carelessly i treated you last night but you should still be feeling the major blood loss and rapid healing your body had to endure throughout."

That would be the soreness, I frowned. "Okay, I'm noticing inconsistencies in your protection, sir. So imma need you to explain it. Your healing covers every physical injury no matter how small, right? Except for the one on my arm because that was part of a payment?"