Summer Rains

16

2019

"Hey, Felix. I miss you so much, and it was all a mistake. I'm sorry and I regret every second of it. I regretted it while it happened. I don't expect forgiveness, but I just need you to talk to me. Please. I love you." 

I replayed the voice message, not caring if I sounded desperate. Waking up becomes the same repetitive process. The same feelings were always there and the hope was quickly crushed when I went to check my phone. I couldn't do this anymore, I had to hear something. At least hear his voice say something, it was a need at this point. 

Opening up my messages I clicked on Reuben's name. 

Me

Hey! Can you please tell Felix to at least text me? I desperately need to talk.

I closed my phone and sighed. After two hours there was still no response from either of them. "Dani!" I heard my dad call. I silenced my phone for the first time in days and went downstairs to see what he needed. 

"Yeah?" My dad busied himself around the kitchen, making some breakfast by the smell of it. 

"Please eat." Was all he said as he stirred the cream batter and made perfectly round circles on the pan. I nodded and took my seat at the breakfast table. "Your mom will be back this evening, she's pretty busy this week." I was grateful that he stopped grilling me with information from the party. Probably because of the lack of Felix and I must've taken the hint. 

"Smells good." I broke the silence. Dad granted and plopped two steaming pancakes onto my plate. 

"Syrups in the cabinet." He pointed with the spatula. I got my plate and pulled out the butter and syrup.

"Fruit?" I asked. Dad pulled out another clear bowl full of berries and handed it to me over the counter. 

"Anything?" He asked. I knew what he was talking about and I shook my head. 

"I even texted Reuben."

"He'll come around." I nodded, still not too sure of that. "You two were so close, nothing can stop that." I thanked him and began eating, feeling better now that something was in my stomach. 

"I turned my phone off and leave it like that for the rest of the day probably."

"Good idea." He smiled. After breakfast, I made my way into the living room and turned on Friends. I couldn't laugh at any jokes, but at least it was some sort of a distraction. The sun fell and I stayed there, curled up in the blanket with the tv still on. Dad only came in a few times to give me food, but for the most part, spent his time outside gardening or in the dining room working. 

"I'm home!" I heard my mom holler from the entryway. She came over to me and gave me a kiss on the forehead. "How are you doing?" She sat down beside me, watching the show. 

"Alright." 

"Love you, baby." She kissed me once more before going into the kitchen with dad. I stayed that way until I felt my stomach grumble. 

"Soup?" Dad said, entering the room as if he could read my mind. He ruffled my curls as I passed. We ate in pretty much silence, other than my mom and dad talking about work and the neighbors once in a while. 

"Goodnight," I mumbled after I finished with the dishes. Mom looked up from the couch, a mug of ice cream in her hand. 

"Already?" She asked, taking her feet off the coffee table to reach for the remote. 

"Yeah, I'm tired." She smiled sweetly and wished me goodnight, dad saying the same as I passed the dining room. I shut the door to my room behind me and looked to my phone on the desk. Shaking my head bundled myself in my covers and waited for sleep to come. Tossing and turning for hours, I finally felt my eyes shut.