The Beauty of Coincidence | manxman | (Historical Fiction)

VI - Writings of the Innocent

Entry One

Saturday

01 January 1812

Today is my birthday!

Mother said she commissioned four pies from Barley & Duke's Bakery just for me. I can't wait to eat a cut from each of them. The peach is my absolute favorite, but anything from Barley & Duke's could impress even the king himself. The pies won't be delivered until evening, so I've got the entire day to think of their splendor.

This morning, Everard traveled home to gift a present for my birthday. It was this very journal and he treated me to a journey to Mr. Hinkley's book shop in the city. I haven't displayed much interest when it comes to fictional works, but Everard introduced me to the likes of these sorts of writers. He bought The Crimes of Love by Marquis de Sade for me, and also suggested a fair amount of dramas. I never knew my brother was such a theater fanatic, so that was quite a discovery. He promised to take me to London someday soon to enjoy a good showing of The Alchemist with him – when he manages to find the time somehow. A trip with Everard would surely be something to record, I'm sure.

That is not where all my birthday splendor lied today.

Christopher came to visit as well. He arrived the minute Everard and I returned from the city. A part of me often assumes my brother hasn't a single notion toward Christopher and I's true relationship, but somehow I also know he is not so dense. He has caught the redness in my cheeks when Christopher comes around. I only remain silent with him about my clear focuses, for he has yet to confront me. Everard has always been the kind of person who speaks from his heart, so I believe if he wished to question or insert an input into my life, he would have done so by now. Anyhow, Christopher and I went away to the Highland Church together. That is where we always go to be alone and completely out of sight. Since it has gone abandoned, we often find ourselves there. It is a peaceful section of the kingdom I pray is never claimed again. He brought his poems and violin. Today, I am certain I fell even deeper in love with him than I could have ever imagined.

I thanked God for this day.

✦ ✦ ✦

Entry Two

Friday

26 January 1812

I've seemed to have jinxed myself when I mentioned Everard never questioning my times with Christopher. Yesterday evening, I went to my brother's house alone to ask for more book recommendations, for I have become quite enamored with fictional works these past few days. I've managed to finish ten fantastic reads in four days. My father doesn't find my hobby very nice, but my mother enjoys it when I recount my readings to her. I'm quite the dramatic storyteller.

Back to my brother –

He wasn't as pressing about the matter when I arrived, but after an hour or so, he mentioned Christopher as Evie was preparing dinner for us all. In the beginning, when he insisted he was well aware of my feelings and my lack of interest in women, I attempted to shove his claims aside, but while I am a rather good storyteller...I am rubbish when it comes to lying. Although there was no mirror before me, I was sure my face had turned a brilliant red and I defended myself, but even with my obvious franticness, Everard calmed me to his best abilities, and he did something that made me fracture. I had never cried so hard in my life when Everard told me it was all right for me to feel how I feel about Christopher.

In this day, boys like myself, we are not allowed to seek love from other boys. People like myself are often tormented and put to death without so much as a single thought. Everard, on the other hand, he spoke kindly to me, assured me that my secret was safe with him - Evie, even, given she'd been within earshot and assured me with a smile. Always, I have respected and loved my brother with all my heart, but my admiration for him only grew exponentially last night. He swore to never speak or think ill of me. That is all I desire, to be treated like every other normal boy would. I am normal. It is not my fault the entirety of the world cannot see it.