Jenlisa one-shot

But I Always Will

Plastic dinosaurs and small stuffed animals are scattered across the living room floor. From inside the kitchen, Lisa can hear the wonderful sound of Alvin's giggles as they bounce off the walls and blend with Jennie's warm laughter.

"Now, who's the fastest baby in the world? Show me huh? Crawl to mama!"

Her heart quivers in her chest. Swallowing the tight lump in her throat, she throws the dish towel across her shoulder and leans against the half wall that partly encloses the kitchen area from the living room. Here she can watch her six-month-old son work his way towards Jennie who is sitting a mere two feet from her, a proud grin brightening her face.

"Yeah, I know you can do it big boy! Come on"

Once he has finally reached her, she picks him up and he squeals in excitement when she makes a happy face.

Everything that they've been through this past two months aside, Lisa would be a fool to ignore how much Jennie loves their son. It's perhaps the only thing they still share; their overwhelming love for him that they've felt since before he was even born.

Hell, it's the sole reason why she's letting her stay during the weekends.

After setting Alvin down again, Jennie catches Lisa watching, holds her gaze for a moment. "You need help out there?"

Battling the urge to bite her lower lip, she shakes her head. A heavy silence grows between them, which is only broken by Alvin's enthusiastic babbling. When he fists at the fabric of his mama's pants, Jennie turns her attention back to him and Lisa feels a few tears stick to her eyelashes. She flees back into the kitchen to stir the pot of creamy mac and cheese, trying to shut out the sound of Jennie playing with their son. It used to fill her to the brim with bliss, but now it just cuts a deep hole right through her chest.

A couple of minutes later, she turns her head in time to see Jennie enter the kitchen carrying a whimpering Alvin. "I think someone's hungry" She says with a slight smile before handing their baby to her. "I'll finish this"

"Thank you" Lisa replies, cooing under her breath to comfort Alvin.

As she passes Jennie, she can't resist placing a hand on her shoulder, and though it might be harmless it feels strange now, yet no stranger than sitting alone while she nurses their baby boy.

Before the split, Jennie always sat by her just in case she needed help with something. Most of the time, however she didn't and Jennie simply used it as an excuse to be with them. Now she fears that she has driven her away.

"I put the mac and cheese in the fridge for you" her ex calls out, peeking around the corner of the half wall. Looking into her eyes, Lisa manages a tiny smile as she cuddles Alvin's head. She can sense her hesitating before she walks through the living room, passing the television slowly enough to steal a glance which stabs at her heart.

She can't handle it.

"Why don't you sit down? If you keep pacing like that you might distract our son" is her reasoning, which barely has any grounds, but it's enough to make her listen. As soon as she has taken a seat next to her on the couch, Jennie can't resist brushing a finger against Alvin's round cheek, causing her to make a soft noise. "He loves when you're here"

At those delicate words, she stares at her for a few long seconds, and though it seems like she wants to say something, she doesn't — at least not until a minute of silence has passed, which isn't as uncomfortable as usual. "I think he is getting a bit drowsy"