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I S A B E L L A

I jump from my slumber, sweat drips down my face and neck, i feel gross and sticky. My hands shake from the nightmare i just experienced. I look over to Axel, who is he's facing away from me. 

I woke up at the crack of dawn, the big window that stretched from ceiling to the floor by Axel's bed displayed the sunrise that over looked the beach.

I was still shaken up by the nightmare when i slipped out of bed and ambled to the bathroom. I remember it so vividly, it felt real.

I was with my parents, in a car. We drove together as we sang our favourite song, i remember it exactly because they're voice sounded real, i felt them, when they looked at me it was genuine. It was real.

I remember how genuinely happy i was as we sang the lyrics of the song. I remember my papa, he was driving, he looked at me through the rear view window, he sent me a warm and gentle smile, his eyes held love and care. It warmed my heart, i felt so so happy.

Then the car was swerving off the road, it was rolling down the hill so fast i could barely comprehend it, and by the time i did it had stopped. It was quiet, too quiet.

I remember when i finally opened my eyes and looked down at my bare arms and legs, there wasn't a single bruise. There was no scratches, no blood and not a single bruise on my body.

I looked at my parents, and it was like my dream was giving me a reality check. Because when i saw my parents dead, my mother bruised and bloody, my father over the steering wheel unresponsive my whole world crashed all over again right before my eyes.

I splashed water on my face, disguising the tears that have fallen down my face with water.

I sucked in a breath through my nose, i let the water drip off my face and hung my head low, my hands gripped onto the sink counter as hard as i could.

Then a sob escaped my lips, i slapped my hand over my mouth to keep quiet, but all it did was muffle my loud sobs that i could hardly hold in.

It was a dream, Isabella.

It was just a dream.

I didn't know how long i stayed in the bathroom repeating those words to myself. I slowly removed my hands off my face, i looked at myself in the mirror. It was just a dream.

Once i had fully calmed down, my eyes were swollen and puffy, my face was red and stained with tears.

I was a weak, pathetic girl.

I pushed my hair back and took a deep breath before opening the door and poking my head out, Axel was no longer in bed. I really had been there for a while.

His back was facing me as he sat on a large couch chair with his arm thrown over the back of the couch chair. He held a cigarette with his fingers, as he blew out smoke. I watched the smoke linger around him as he remained silent, looking at the sunrise.

The sun blooms on the horizon, golden petals stretching ever outwards into the rich blue. It is the brilliant flower of the sky that warms our days. It is the invitation to a new day, that sunrise so ordinary extraordinary. Axel looked like just a dark shadow in front of bright beams of light, i admired it.

I stepped out of the bathroom, quietly shutting the door behind me before stepping fully into the room. I sauntered to my bed, grabbing Kai's hoodie he handed me last night before throwing it on.

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