If Our Love Is Wrong || Jikook [COMPLETE]

Chapter 3

Jungkook knew that Jimin could tell that he was being distant, but it wasn't for reasons he likely would ever suspect. He knew most likely Jimin thought he had done something wrong and Jungkook knew he should explain to Jimin that it was nothing he did. Jimin didn't do anything wrong. It was all Jungkook's fault for wanting something he shouldn't want. It was his feelings changing towards Jimin and his attraction to Jimin that had caused him to keep his distance from him.

Ever since that night in the bathroom where he finally admitted himself and even Yoongi what he had been in denial about all these long torturous months he'd become even more scared than he had been before. He was scared that Jimin would be able to tell since Yoongi had been able too. Yoongi assured him that wasn't the case, but Jungkook couldn't chance it. He just couldn't. So, he'd been staying away from Jimin. It was the best solution Jungkook had been able to come up with especially since he didn't want a repeat of that night all those months ago when Jungkook had finally put two and two together and took out his fear of his realized feelings for Jimin out on Jimin himself when he'd jumped on his back that night just like he did any other night.

That night still haunted Jungkook, specifically the hurtful things he said but more so how Jimin just completely shut down and after that treated him completely differently. Jimin no longer clung to him or hugged him. For the first couple of months after that night Jimin wouldn't even touch him unless it was for the cameras. Those two months were torture. Jungkook missed Jimin in a way he didn't know was possible. Jungkook craved Jimin's touch so whenever Jimin did touch him he savored it even though he knew it was only for the cameras. It wasn't until last month through effort on Jungkook's part that things slowly started to become normal. Well, their new normal.

Jungkook had invited Jimin to go out to eat. Granted he'd also done it out of worry because he knew Jimin had slipped into old habits after the night he blew up at him. Jimin had hesitated but in the end joined him. The dinner itself was spent mostly in silence, them both just picking at their food. It wasn't until their walk along the Han River that Jungkook had finally worked up the courage to apologize to Jimin. At least give him a better apology than the one he gave him the day after everything happened which literally consisted of him saying, "I'm sorry." Nothing more nothing less. This time Jungkook when he apologized, he explained to Jimin that he had been going through some things and Jungkook had taken that out on him to cope with what he was going through. Jimin as always was understanding which made Jungkook feel even worse. Jungkook hadn't realized how deeply he had hurt Jimin until he had hugged him. As soon as he'd pulled Jimin to him by his sleeve and wrapped his arms around him Jimin had tensed up his own arms not moving until Jimin realized that Jungkook wasn't going to let go until he reciprocated it. Only then did Jimin hug him back. Jungkook knew he was probably holding Jimin too tightly to him, but Jimin never complained. After they got back to the dorm, they watched one of their favorite movies and things got better.

Now though Jungkook felt like they were heading back to square one and again his fault. He just didn't know what to do. Regardless, this wasn't going to work. He couldn't let things go back to those two months of what he deemed the worst in his life no matter how scared he was, which is how he found himself standing outside Jimin's bedroom door knocking on it. There was no answer, so Jungkook knocked again. Still no answer. Jungkook decided to just open the door, so he did. He opened it slowly and once in the room closed it quietly. When his eyes adjusted to the semidarkness of the room, he spotted Jimin on his bed curled up into a ball. He could tell he was sleeping. Jungkook stepped closer to Jimin's bed. His legs bumping the edge Jungkook looked down at Jimin sleeping and couldn't help but stare. Jimin looked beautiful. Angelic even. He had no make-up on his black hair was fluffy falling against his forehead and pillow a stark contrast in black and white. Jungkook wanted to coo and cry at the same time.

Without thinking Jungkook carefully climbed into Jimin's bed and wrapped himself around him. Jungkook burrowed himself into the back of Jimin's neck and took a deep breath. He felt all the stress that had been bundled up inside him come undone like someone had snapped their fingers. All Jungkook could feel was Jimin's warmth. He was so focused on that feeling that he hadn't heard Jimin stir awake.

"Jungkook?"

Jungkook didn't respond at first, only pulling Jimin tighter against his chest.

"I'm sorry hyung."

Jimin didn't respond. So Jungkook apologized again.

"I'm sorry Jimin."

This time when Jungkook apologized Jimin shifted in his hold turning to face him. Jungkook's breath caught, and his heart felt like it was hammering out of his chest when Jimin reached his hand up and wiped tears he didn't even know had leaked from his eyes.

"It's okay Jungkook." Jimin spoke softly.

"It's not." Jungkook whispered placing his hand over Jimin's that was still wiping tears away.

Jimin scooted closer and removed his hand from Jungkook's face along with his own and placed it at his back. Jungkook took the que and branch Jimin offered and wrapped his arms around Jimin and laid his head against Jimin's chest where he could hear his heart beating. A moment later Jimin began carding his fingers through his hair. All Jungkook could think was how much he didn't deserve Jimin's compassion. His care. Because if he knew. He couldn't even finish the thought, instead apologizing over and over.

"I'm sorry Jimin. I'm so sorry. I'm-"

"Shh, Jungkook it's okay. I promise."

"It's not. I wish. I wish I."

Jungkook began to cry into Jimin's chest wishing he could tell Jimin everything. Wishing but knowing that Jimin would never want to hold him like this if he knew that Jungkook wanted so much more with him. That he wanted to kiss him. To love him. He felt Jimin stop carding his fingers through his hair and wrap his arms around his back holding him firmer to him before he spoke.

"Jungkook. I don't know what you are going through. But just know that hyung will always be here for you whenever you are ready to talk about what's been bothering you."

"You'll never want to talk to me again if I tell you." Jungkook mumbled into Jimin's chest.

At his confession Jimin pulled away from him putting space between them so he could look at Jungkook. Jungkook wouldn't look at him.

"Jungkook look at me."

Jungkook finally looked up and met Jimin's ever concerned eyes with his watery ones.

"Nothing you tell me will make me leave you. I will always be here for you no matter what."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

With that promise from Jimin that no matter what he wouldn't leave Jungkook he felt the same feeling he'd had in the bathroom with Yoongi. Maybe things will be okay.