My Reincarnated Life Is Wrong, Source: Me

Episode 4

~As Expected, The Dreams of Youth Are Wrong~

My dinner with Komachi wasn't a quiet affair like the last time we ate together. We enjoyed a light conversation about how our days went, in which I informed her that Shizuka force me into the Service (Club). I told her a little bit about my new unit's squadmates that I'll be taking charge of.

There's the fact that the Corporal's leadership skills suck, and it's not like I can just kick her off to OCS for the training she needs. Yukinoshita could never cut it as a Sergeant, but she'd make for a hell of an Officer. She's already an ice-hearted bitch after all. As for the Specialist, well... she's special.

Of course, I only gave Komachi my most mundane civilian thoughts on the matter. As if I'd ever tell my dear little sister that I served in the Army. I'd never want her to find out that I killed someone her age... Fucking Afghanistan!

Achievement unlocked: Thank You For Your Service

And fuck you achievement-chan!

...Really 8man, just how fucking twisted were you for your brain to auto-generate these damn things? No, it's not a feature Kyon, and stop laughing!

This time Komachi merely frowned when I told her that I would do the dishes, but brighten up a bit when I ask her to make some coffee. She shook her head in slight disappointment when I said to make mine black. Sadly as things are right now I couldn't trust myself not to fuck up my coffee...

With a nice hot cup of black coffee finally, in hand, I entered my room.

Haruhi knows it's past time to do a personal sitrep after wasting a night of doing fuck all. I never could have guessed that my Star Wars fandom would pull the trigger on me. Such a thing has never happened to me before so it was completely unexpected. Then again on Earth-Prime my time in the Army was always with me. Why the fuck were my memories of the Army patched into me like one of those fucking Windows service updates you can't turn off?!

...Wait, it's all Haruhi's shitty internet bandwidth?

It always has been... Kyon, stop playing with distraction-chan and put that damn gun away, this isn't the time for memes.

But seriously, is the memory of my death going to pop out of nowhere at some inconvenient moment as well? Will it be some fuckin cliché sponsored by Mitsubishi?! ...Yeah, I know that's a damn flag Kyon! I can't help but feel that my reincarnated life in this fucking anime world is wrong.

Ever since my little episode in the consultation office, it's becoming harder to suppress the little over five years I spent in the Army. So much so that the skill Hiki-Persona 8 is now at risk of becoming unstable. My now too sharp memory isn't helping matters as it processes the information. It's like I'm looking at a service jacket that's been redacted. A wave of nostalgia and pain wash over me as I remember a part of the past I wish stayed locked away.

There was the time I and my two best friends from JROTC enlisted straight out of high school. How I pissed off an Officer from Admin. That fucking ticket puncher sent my ass rattling around the 10th Division like a bad penny as I was forced into deployment after deployment from Fort Drum to fucking Afghanistan again and again. The bastard must have thought of that as a punishment. I'm sure it would have been for him... I fucking loved it. The look on my friend's faces as I reported in as their squad leader was fuckin priceless. With them as my team leaders, it was the best time of my life... Right up until that fucking incompetent piece of shit ordered my squad into that clusterfuck...

... Let's not think about that Hachiman. I took another sip of coffee as my mind moved away from the past and turned toward the future.

Although it's something I really wish could have lived without... The 'service update' wasn't a complete fuck you for me. The skills Stealth-Hiki, Shooting with a gun, Human Observation, Finding faults in others, Feigning Sleep, Blabbering to himself, Becoming a good guy in later arcs, and even Hiki Dancer all received strong bonuses. Many more skills were added to the pool for the hundred and eight skill slots, and reorganizing them would give me something to do in class.