Why ?

Monitoring a sheep

Bellum POV

As I was leaving my personal laboratory as I do every lunchtime, I went through the infirmary and without surprise I found a sleeping Black Sheep. It had been about a month since she had tried to commit suicide and we had to stabilize her urgently. She had fallen into a coma and it was impossible to bring her out of it. Since then, we have been debating endlessly. Should we let her die or keep her alive ? I took the opportunity to remove the stitches from her left arm. Her tendons have recovered quite well and with a little training she will be able to use it fully again. As for her right wrist, the only visible traces of her suicide attempt are the white scars that are beginning to form on her skin. Turning around I leave the room, leaving my staff to attend to the changing of her bandages when one of the assistants calls me back.

"Doctor Bellum, the girl is showing signs of activity."

"May she never be left alone until she wakes up. I have no class this afternoon, so let me know when she awakens."

A few hours later

Carmen POV

The last thing I remembered slightly (like some kind of nightmare) was being thrown into my cell and tied up via the usual chains. As I looked at my hand, which had been cleaned, I could see it was still red. I had to get it off at all costs. With difficulty I grasped a stone with my left hand. Why was it so difficult to use it ? Oh, what the hell, it didn't matter. I had to get it out. So I kept scratching and scratching without stopping. How long had I been scratching? I had no idea. I could feel the pain but it didn't matter. Only the red mattered. Then total darkness.

As I gradually regained my senses, I felt something hold my knees and waist. Something is on my face but I can't tell what. I can hear a conversation in the distance, either people are whispering or the blur of waking up has not yet dissipated. Someone grabs my right hand and lifts it before manipulating it. Contrary to what I thought, I feel no pain from this touch. As I am released, I manage to lift my hand to touch my face and notice that the thing I was feeling is nothing more than a breathing mask over my mouth and nose. Someone forcibly removes my hand and I feel the familiar tingle of a metal strap closing as a loud voice is heard.

"Tell Doctor Bellum she's awake."

I force my eyes open and see two or three people exit the room, leaving me alone. The room is completely white, as is the table I'm on. Some machines are connected to my body such as a heart monitor, a breathing aid... Metal straps hold my knees, arms and my hip. A few minutes, which seem like hours to me, pass before I hear the door open again. I raise my head to look in that direction and see Dr Bellum approaching, her eyes fixed on her tablet. Arriving above me, she unplugs the various devices and removes the mask so I can speak.

"Are you just stupid or are you doing this on purpose ?"

"I don't know what you're talking about..." My voice sounds hoarse, as if I haven't spoken in days, even weeks...

"That answers my question. I'm talking about your suicide attempt ! How could you think you would succeed ?!"

"I-I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention. I didn't mean to..."

"I'm cutting you off here Black Sheep, I'm not interested in your reasons. I'm not the one who's going to run your therapy, so I'll let you give them to Professor Maelstrom." She deactivates my restraints from the computer before walking back to the door. "Come on get up and follow me. You know how much Maelstrom doesn't like you making him wait. Besides, I don't have time to deal with a silly little girl." I scramble to my feet and fall to the ground as I try to take a step. Hearing the sound of my fall, she walks in and giggles when she sees me on the ground.