C. [trans copia x trans male reader]

chapter 1: not okay

Copias POV:

My alarm started blaring. It's 8:00am. I got barely any sleep. I groan sleepily and sit up. My head hurts.

I walk to the bathroom wearing only a facepaint stained tank top and black boxers and stare into the mirror unhappy with myself.
Why can't I have been born a man.

Nobody knows I'm trans. I feel like it would change their views on me.

I step into the shower not looking down at my body. I finish showering and I dry off.
I walk out of the bathroom and find something to wear from my closet.
I put on my black suit and walk back to the bathroom to put on my make up. How I do it good every time I've no clue.

I need to tell the others but I'm scared. I adjust my binder from under my clothes and make sure I'm flat enough. I take a deep sigh and walk out my room to the dining hall. All the ghouls are there. Y/N was just playing around as usual.

I love my ghouls. They're so adoreable.

It's now 9:23am and I sit down at the end of the table, where i usually sit.

"So did everyone sleep well?" I say groggily before sipping on my black coffee.

"Eh not really" rain says "great!" Cumulus and cirrus chime. "Alright I guess" sodo says grumpily as usual. "Eh same as usual" everyone else said.
"Good..Good."

"Hey, papa are you okay? You seem a bit off" y/n says worriedly.
"Eh, yeah, yeah! I'm fine just didn't sleep much..like 4 hours or so," I say saying I'm alright, but eh.
"..remember if you want to talk were always here!" Sunshine says. "Thankyou my ghouls and ghoulettes.." everyone finishes up and we all help clean up. After that I walk through the ministry to my office. I stare at my papers, sorting out tour dates and I hear a knock on the door.

Y/n's pov

"Hello? Who is it?" Papa asks from inside. "Hey its me y/n, I wanted to talk to you about something" I say my tail drooping slightly. "A..alright come in."

I walk in, "take a seat" he aims at the chair infront of his desk. "What is it you wanted to talk about?" He asks in a questioning tone.
"I, I just wanted to talk to you about, well..-" I say hesitantly. "Well?" He eyes confused. "..you've just not been yourself recently, I'm worried." I say. "It's nothing to worry about. I'm fine. I told you in fine im just tired" he says slightly annoyed. "Oh okay papa..I'll be heading out then," and I do.

Copias pov

I sit in my chair just thinking. I walk to the bathroom next to the office. I walk back.
I end up walking to the ministry kitchen to get some coffee. I'm literally exhausted. Last night was a bad night. I walk back to the office and walk into the bathroom. I roll up my sleeves to wash my hands and stare at the red bumps. I deeply regret lying to y/n and the other ghouls..but they might see me as "weak" or "unfit as papa". I might get replaced for all i know!"

I look at the calander. 3 weeks till the tour in the uk. Its a smaller tour leg but wow amazing audience. I sigh as my social battery is at an all time 0.

I sit down typing on the typewriter doing paperwork and such and I sigh. I all of a sudden get a wave of sadness and feel like sobbing. I tear up but slap myself to stop. I grab my face and groan. My chest hurts. Probably because I'm dangerously binding but hey gotta do what I need to. I chug my coffee despite the fact its scalding hot.

I walk out my office and all the ghouls are taking turns on the x-box playing minecraft. I walk up to the top of the church and I sit there on the edge. Just sitting there. I wasn't ACTUALLY going to jump, right?. All of a sudden I hear someone walking up the mantinence ladder, the way I did. It's rain. "Papa. Why are you up here? We've been looking for you!" he says worriedly. "Oh I like it up here.." I say looking over the edge. "Cmon let's go the others are waiting" he says.
As we're walking through the halls, he asks" Hey uhm..papa, are you sure you're alright?".
"I've said MANY times. I'm FINE." I say accidentally shouting, scaring him.

He sounds as if he's about to cry "Oh alright.." I could see his eyes were welling up. "Im sorry my ghoul.." I say quietly. "Oh, no, no it's fine.." he says slightly whispering so I couldn't hear his voice wavering.

7:40 pm

Y/n's pov

I sit in my room in my spare time usually. I sit worrying about papa. I rock back and fourth my anxiety going mad. My tail is now curled around My legs, I feel myself about to have a panic attack. I get them sometimes as I have anxiety, I hear a knock. "Uh.. hello-??" I shout. "Hey its swiss, I just wanted to say food is here but can I talk yo you first?" He says. I quickly rub the tears off my face. "Uhm, yeah come in!".

Swiss usually helps with panic attacks and comforts me when I'm having one. I'm glad to have him.

He walks in. "Before I nocked I heard sobbing..are you okay? You seem stressed man." He says slightly worried as he sat on my bed next to me. I collapse on him into a hug and just start sobbing. "Hey..its alright.." he comforted as he rubbed my hair softly and hugged me tight. "What's going on..?" He asked once I calmed down a bit. "Im just..really worried about papa. I over thought alot" I say. "We all are..we're trying our best to get him to open up. Are you alright now??" He asks. "Yeah ill be fine.." I answer and we walk to the dining hall.

Papa looked really depressed..