C. [trans copia x trans male reader]

chapter 23. heart break.

Copia pov.

I woke up expecting to be flat.

It was a dream???

I sat up in disbeleif.

No..no no no no.

"FOR FUCK SAKE." I had shouted a little too loud.

I thought it was real? I thought it was finally happening! But no. The universe decides to fuck me over once again.

I fall back onto my bed and cry. I thought I was finally going to be happy. Why? Why does this shit have to happen to me!? I've done fuck all to deserve this..!

I look at the time. It's 8:50am. I groaned and wiped my tears. I got up anyways.
I sat at my end of the table and sipped on my kids temp latte. I sigh.

"Uh..papa. you don't look yourself..are you ok.?" Swiss asked
"Im fine. Don't worry about me." I said holding back tears.

I don't eat much. I stay in my room most of the day.

I felt urges again damn it..i don't want to do this again. Fuck no. I look for y/n frantically. I found him and hug him tight. From that point I broke down.
"Hey hey what's the matter..?"He asked in his softly spoken voice. It calmed me. "Can we go to one of our rooms I'll explain.."I said through sobs. Yeah, yeah no problem! Let's go to mine.."he said leading me there.

I sat on his bed wiping my tears. "What happened..?" He asked gently. "I had a dream I.. " I explained the dream. About top surgery and feeling comfortable and stuff.. it was excruciating.

Y/n pov.

It hurt to hear this. I hugged him tight. "Im so sorry..."I muttered hugging him tighter.

"Im so sorry you have to go through this..you aren't alone beleive me please beleive me I've been through it myself..not dreaming about it but...you know..being trans. I know its so hard but please I know you can power through it c..I love you and ill help you every step of the way. Your journey isn't over.." I said. My voice wavered as I held back tears.

"I was uh.." he paused. "You were what..?" I said holding his big manly hands. I love his hands..
"I was getting uh..urges so. I came to find you-" he said painfully. "Self harm urges..?" I asked. He nodded slowly.

"Oh copia.." I hugged him tighter than before. At that point I cried. It hurt too much to see him like this.

"I love you so much..you're my beautiful boy..my boyfriend..you're so handsome..you're perfect the way you are copia. No matter what" I said crying. I stroked his hair softly.

After a while he said something.
"I love you so much.." copia muttered quietly.

"Should we watch something on the TV? Mabye like a spiderman movie or something?" I suggested.

"Yeah..I'd love that." He smiled slightly.

I turned on my TV and put into the spiderverse on we cuddled eachother on my bed for most of the day.

I know helping him exhausts me, but I'd rather be extremely burnt out than him ending up killing himself..I love him too much and it'd hurt me deeply.

Both pov.

No matter what, I'm going to be there for him every step of the way, And I'm sure he's there for me too. I love him dearly and would hate to see him spiral.