C. [trans copia x trans male reader]

chapter 17.

Papa pov:

"You're alive.." he says.

My brain is still slightly foggy but I could tell it was him.

he walked over and hugged me. It feels like years since the last time he hugged me.

He starts sobbing and I don't know how to react.

"How do you feel papa?" Cirrus asks. "Uh.." I stammer trying my best to speak. Its difficult currently. "I feel okay eh..drugs" I said slurring. "I think he means he feels fine because of all of the drugs given by the doctor" Swiss says. "Mhm." I say.

"We have to go soon. But we'll be here for visits every day" someone says I can't quite tell as I'm falling asleep again.

* a week and a bit later*

I was finally getting out-of the hospital after  being kepton suicide watch. I can't wait to see the ghouls.

It's not a very long drive to the ministry, it takes like 30 minutes.

As I'm pulling into the car park I get this overwhelming thought

If I'm suffering like this, what if one of the others are?? I've traumatised them.

I sit for a little while in the car dissociating then over thinking.

"What if I've caused long term damage?"
"What if they start to struggle?"
"What if I'm in the bathroom a little too long and they start to panic and worry for me?"
"What if I succeed in suicide and they do it too??"
"What if I accidentally encourage one of them to take their life?"
"What If HE takes his life? He already struggles"

I slap myself and look in the mirror on the car.

"Cmon pull yourself together C." I say aloud.

I get out shortly after and walk into the ministry

"Im back."