Devil's Gambit

Chapter 12

Things seemed to be looking up the following week, as everyone had finally come to a mutual understanding of each other- well, as good of an understanding as it gets. Harley was glad to see Axel and Lucas become close again, it was pleasant seeing a glimpse of what it was like before he had arrived, the dynamic duo Daniel had rumored them to be. Lucas appeared to finally be moving on from his romantic investment in Axel, and Harley wondered if time was all he needed, because unrequited love was going to hurt like hell no matter what.

Amongst all of the positive changes, however, something still deeply bothered Harley. After Lucas and Axel appeared to have patched up their relationship, Harley was effectively cast aside by Lucas. He no longer teased Harley when he was a captive audience in the shower while Lucas shaved or brushed his teeth, he never made sexual jokes towards him at the table, or even sat next to him. He would walk into the house joking around with Axel, and then immediately go upstairs while Axel sat down to have a conversation with Harley, one of his promised improvements.

Harley felt so guilty when he realized he was more focused on where Lucas went than paying attention to Axel, even though his older brother was trying his best to amend his failures and be a better sibling to him. What kind of brother was Harley to Axel now?

He thought he would be thrilled to have Lucas uninvolved in his life, no longer making him uncomfortable with crude humor or piercing gazes, but now a deep hole resided in Harley's chest from the tall man's absence. The few memories he had of Lucas often came to surface as he laid alone in bed, staring up at the popcorn ceiling that was likely teeming with asbestos. The majority of those memories were not pleasant, in actuality they made Harley wince in embarrassment at the awkwardness and tension that laced those recollections; but the memories of patching Lucas up in the bathroom, and of their time spent together at one in the morning in front of the roadside diner, were his favorite. They brought feelings of such serenity and airiness at first, even so much as stretching a wide smile across Harley's face as he thinks about those times, before reality crashes in and he becomes saddened at the loss of a person who is still there. Someone Harley sees everyday.

Remembering wasn't the same, though. Not like he felt in the moment of those memories.

And a small part of him, a twisted, selfish depth within his heart, wished he had never helped Axel and Lucas become friends again. For if Axel had never returned to Lucas' life, then all of his attention wouldn't be taken up by his older brother, and Harley would be able to have a chance again. He didn't like that part of him, and yet couldn't deny its presence, as it would often rear its ugly head into a twinge of jealousy whenever he would see Lucas and Axel together.

Harley closed his zip hip hoodie up to his chin, hunching over as he hugged his mug of warm coffee near his chest to stave off the morning chill. He found himself actually enjoying getting up early now that he didn't have the responsibility of getting himself to school, reveling, in fact, at how quiet the house was at this hour when everyone was still sleeping. It gave him some much needed peace and opportunity to reflect and think about his life goals. Ultimately, he wanted to go to university, but for now he was happy getting a stable job and fixing up the backyard. There was a small smile on his face as he pictured where he could put a few nice butterfly bushes, maybe even some mammoth sunflowers and an apple tree. He should pay Elijah's nana a visit to get her advice on that, because she undeniably had a good eye and mind for what things look best together, even if it was more likely someone else was doing the more laborious parts. Perhaps Harley could offer his work in exchange for her grand ideas and wonderful food.

The cold eventually got to him after a while of sitting outside, so Harley got up and slipped into the house through the back door. He sat his mug down on the kitchen table in his usual spot, taking a seat and searching around on his phone for any nearby businesses that were hiring, thankful the house was still quiet just as the outside was.