Poem: The World

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"The world is evil, don't you know that" my mother screamed 
as a dish broke and I tried not to cover my ears.
But how can I know?
From birth, I've been trapped the prison 
You've built for me.
All my life I've lived the illusion of sheltered and happy
When in reality I was alone and afraid.

I've watched my friends turn to enemies
And stab me in my heart cause they weren't real...
In the first place.
I've been mocked and scorned by my classmates and even worse,
by my own family.
I've endured it all,
internal and external homophobia, self hatred
(all caused by you and your teachings),
racism, bullying and religious trauma.
So I created the perfect world inside my head
far, far away from you and everyone else who hurt me.

So believe me mother I know better than anyone
how ugly and evil the world is.
It's not my fault that I'm a people pleaser,
a glorified a** kisser,
a liar, manipulator and soft hearted girl 
in a stone cold world.

Yes, mother that's just how you raised me 
to be afraid of everyone and everything,
to avoid conflict I've trapped myself in a box
and caged my feelings like you asked,
followed every word you said like a robot,
to detach myself from people
I became a two faced wh...

You may not know all of this
so I'll tell you now
the world is ugly but so...

AM I

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