dr stone oneshots & hcs!

body image - senku ishigami

Maybe you were dedicated to the "fake it till you make it" mindset.

Your schoolmates would describe you as the most put together person anyone will ever meet; level-headed and secure about everything, from your appearance to your grades. On the outside, everything about you exuded confidence; your outgoing and passionate personality, your bold appearance, even the way you carried yourself.

It's not often that you complain, and because of this, others tend to forget that you're human. They can't think of any weaknesses or insecurities you may have, and aspire to have the confidence you do. You have an active social life, you're smart, and you're definitely not awful looking- what's not to want?

What your classmates also seem to forget is that confidence is not a personality trait. If you were being honest, it's not even something you felt all that often.

On the inside, you battled insecurities that plagued your thoughts and led you to develop unhealthy habits. The insecurities were related to one struggle in particular that you found difficult to overcome- issues related to your body image. To you and to Senku Ishigami, one of your closest friends, your insecurity made you put on a big show for both those around you and yourself, forced you to work even harder and constantly present yourself in a likable manner.

Senku could understand wanting to look approachable and presentable, but he himself has never been meticulous about his appearance, so he couldn't truly understand in full the insecurity that stemmed from it. Senku was never one to crave validation either, especially through his looks. As a man of logic, he can't understand why anyone would follow through with assumptions and judgements about a person based on their appearance; the only way to truly know someone and to grow fond of them is through actions, is it not? He's even heard you voice those exact thoughts.

But regardless, he catches the subtleties in your manner. Typically turning down snack or food offers from your friends. Constantly making adjustments to your appearance throughout the day. Covering a certain feature on your face with a hand placement that's conveniently casual. All seemingly very small habits, but eventually growing to be more prominent due to their repetitiveness.

Senku has observed from the time the two of you spend alone together that you let on a little bit more than you do with others. Your comments seem pretty harmless on the surface, maybe even commendable, but he knew that through the false sweetness in your voice there was an unhealthy fixation. "Just for health purposes!" you would insist. "There's nothing wrong, I just want to look nice!" He also later takes note of body strain that seems to be connected to your overcrowded schedule, reserving a lot of your time in the evening to go to the gym.

Senku's eyebrows would furrow together and he'd let out an airy chuckle, tilting his head down to better observe your face, as if he were searching for something on it. "You always look nice." he'd reply with a roll of his eyes. The same with "You're ten billion percent healthy already."

Senku already had a fair amount of scientific knowledge in medical areas even before he noticed your concerning habits, but he wanted to be thorough, and so he researched. He learned more about body dysmorphia, ED's and a lot of weight and appearance related mental and physical health issues. As he delves deeper and deeper into his research, he notices through piles of resources that you share many of the habits described in articles and medical books. Senku wanted to encourage discussion about your insecurities because he could tell that your body image issues affected you more than they should, but he didn't want to force anything and risk having you retreat more into your self-doubt and away from him. But one day while you were at his house, he found you staring a little too hard and too long at your reflection in his bedroom mirror.

He could see your brows creased together and your lips twitching, playing with different smiles as if trying them out before they dropped to a frown. You didn't need to say anything in order for Senku to take a good guess at what you were thinking- your actions spoke volume. He sat down in a chair beside his desk, turned it around to face you, and suddenly told you to spit everything out. Everything you were thinking, everything you were feeling. It came out surprisingly kind despite the firmness, and you held his hard gaze for a couple of seconds while reflecting on his words. You looked scared, whether it was because he caught you off guard or because you were afraid to share your thoughts, Senku couldn't tell, but he had a feeling it was a mix of both.

After a couple of moments of tense silence, you finally sighed, slouching as you sat down on the edge of Senku's bed. "I look disgusting."

Not once while you talked did Senku's attention shift elsewhere. He didn't speak a word, but simply listened, absorbing what you told him. He listened the entire time you tried sorting through your jumbled thoughts and feelings, and could tell this was something you had been waiting to let out for a long, long time. Eventually, when your throat grew hoarse and you were too exhausted to continue trying to explain your complicated and conflicting feelings, all Senku replied with was "feel better?" and you didn't know what else you'd expect, but whether your answer is yes or no, he thinks both are completely valid.

You're nervous after opening up to him- after all, covering this huge insecurity gave you your reputation in the first place and made you feel good about yourself, and having Senku see through your show of confidence had you worry how others perceived you. Maybe you didn't cover up as well as you thought, and people viewed you the same way you viewed yourself. But this is Senku we're talking about, and he's hardly interested in contributing to gossip, especially about someone he's close with. If anything, he wants to help how he can if you let him.

He'd do his very best to get your mind off your intrusive thoughts and direct you to resources that could help in more depth. He helps with any lifestyle changes you may want to make, but makes sure you do them for the right reasons, helping you reframe your negative thoughts. He'd tell you all sorts of cool body facts; about your internal organs, how your body could glow- things to get your mind off your appearance and more on how extraordinary the human body actually is and how much it does for you.

You find Senku's efforts and thoughtfulness extremely heartwarming, two big reasons why you slowly became more encouraged to unlearn bad habits and a harsh mentality as time went on. Though there were many hardships along your healing journey, Senku could somehow always manage to pull you out from your rotten daydreams with a fun science fact.