𝖜𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖗 | ᴄᴏʀᴘꜱᴇ ʜᴜꜱʙᴀɴᴅ x ᴏᴄ | ʙᴏᴏᴋ ᴏɴᴇ

The Plausible Move

Violet's voice faltered, the ever threatening tears now attempting to collapse her throat completely. There it was. It was out. Hard part over. She thought, though she knew it was a lie. This was just the beginning...

She anxiously picked up the wine glass again and took another few big chugs. Nope, not doing it for her. Edibles? What would push the tears back?? She'd be damned if she didn't try. She knew he was trying to kiss her, and god it was all that she wanted, but watching him with his charming smile, hearing his deep low laughs and hums, seeing the look in his eyes... she panicked. The stress handed her a plate of fear that she was terrified of him seeing. All the emotional vulnerability was coming to a forefront and the universe was testing her once more. In the worst case scenario, she couldn't let herself continue to get so attached if she ended up being forced to leave again. She wasn't sure she could handle anymore heartbreak.

"I-." Jack felt his gut tighten, the threat of his food coming back up not totally impossible. Of course... of course she would. Why wouldn't she? She didn't want this and certainly didn't want you... how could you be so dumb? Fucking idiot. Maybe if you hadn't pushed her so much with all this romantic bullshit on top of whatever else she's dealing with, she wouldn't be doing the same thing everyone else inevitably does... you are the common denominator here genius. YOU push them away with your shit behavior.

Violet's face snapped Jack from his tirade of thoughts. She stared down now at her tumbler, swishing the burgundy liquid in circles as she fought her eyes, blinking them rapidly every so often, begging them not to well up. Of course thinking about it obviously made them nearly spill over.

She had worked so hard to get where she was. She couldn't lose it all now, this job was supposed to be a major breakthrough for her professional development. Sure, she didn't know if she was on the cut list or not yet, but being such a new hire in an entire office of people that had almost all been there from the start, she was bound to be one of the first cuts. That was just business.

What wasn't just business though, was the absolute sense of dread of this welling up in the dam she had built over these last few months. The sense of dread that she could lose Jack. It violently threatened to break down the now very very weak dam holding pathetically attempting to hold everything back.

"I- Violet... I can't say I'm following..." Jack began to reach out seeing the deterioration of her walls in front of him, but stopped himself, pulling his hand back "Did I do something? I'm uh- fuck." He scoffed at himself humorlessly. "Violet, if I did something to make you feel like-"

"Stop, it's nothing you did.." She raised her finger at him, quickly looking away and finishing the rest of her wine in a long gulp. God, if only the world could swallow her up just the same. It would be so much easier than dealing with all this right now.

"I- I don't understand..." He felt himself wanting to stand as his eyes began to sting, to go to her and drag her back to the couch, or one of their bedrooms and just hold her. Fuck he couldn't go through this again. No- no- no, not again... I can not lose you too...

"Jack it-it's nothing that you did... and even if it had been, today would've entirely made up for anything..." She poured herself another glass. The tears, although still at the surface, still didn't feel under control. "My company is....downsizing. They told us all this morning, but my coworkers have been hinting at it for a couple weeks now, so..." Fuck they were back... She felt her lip quiver and she bit down hard, trying to keep all the intrusive thoughts away. "I just, I just know it'll be me, and- and I'll have to leave. Again." And that was the thought that made them spill over. She took in a shaky breath in and tried to regain her composure before Jack noticed anything, she couldn't let herself cry in front of him, she needed to just handle it like an adult. Shit like this happened. It had happened before, but things were different now.