Driving Force

chapter 41

Cameron Santiago POV

It's been a few weeks since Madison's mom's funeral. It was rough on her but she pushed through. It seems the time she had off she's trying to gain back by overworking herself during practice and weight room. We all told her she's been doing great but she doesn't take our word. She is doing a good job but she swears we are just saying that to make her feel more confident.

"Madison, slow down," I tell her as I see her fully sprint on the treadmill. She chooses to ignore me and I just shake my head.

"Cameron your next on the squat rack." I head over and do my sets.

When we finish with the weight room, we all head back to the hotel to eat lunch and relax. After lunch, I ask Madi if she wants to go out with Kelley, Emily, and me for a coffee run. She denies it saying she's going to Facetime Jessie. With that me and the gals, go out.

"Cameron, when are you going to move in with Kelley?" Sonnet asks. Kelley nudges her not wanting to start this convo again. "What she's not committed to an NWSL team so she can go wherever."

"I think it's best that I stay with Madi."

"Why? She seems more independent than ever?"

I shake my head. "She is but I don't want her to be alone. She needs me."

"What about what I need?" Kelley spits out. I close my eyes and take a deep breath so I keep myself collected. We already went over this and she didn't take it so well the first time.

"Kelley-,"

"No. I have been patient and understanding of what all Madison has been through. I sympathize with her, but you need to live your life. She's holding you back."

"She isn't holding me back!" I snap. I look around making sure I haven't made a scene and lean forward, "She saved my life. I wouldn't be here and maybe not even alive if it wasn't for her."

"You shouldn't feel like you owe her something in return and even if you did, your debts are paid back by helping her recover from her head injury and mother's death."

"That's really selfish, Kelley. I don't remember falling in love with this version of you."

"I've always been this way! You aren't around enough to even know who I am anymore." She gets up, "You know what, I am always to blame in this relationship and I'm getting tired of it."

"I am not blaming you, I just wish you would see where I am coming from. You don't digest what I tell you."

"Guys, maybe we should take this somewhere not public." Sonnet interjects feeling slight guilt for unintentionally asking the question that caused this argument.

"I'm done with it." Kelley says walking away.

I can tell Sonnett didn't know whether to stay with me or go with O'Hara but she ultimately goes with Kelley. "I'll make sure she cools off. She just feels that she's being pushed to the side." I nod.

I make my way back to the hotel going over the conversation. How doesn't she see what Madi means to me? I feel like an older sister to the girl and would never let her fend for herself. But Kelley has a point. I have been so focused on Madi, I spend less time with people I would usually hang out with. I don't do activities without knowing she's okay by herself. But what's wrong with that if I don't mind it? When I get back to my room, I see Madi just getting off her phone call.

"Are you okay?" She's quick to see something was off.

"Just deep thoughts." She stays quiet queuing me to continue. "Can I ask you something very hypothetical?" She nods and makes her way to the bed I have just sat on.

"What if I moved in with Kelley?"

"What about it?"

"What?" I ask confused.

"If you want to move in with Kelley, move in with Kelley." She confidently says.

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"I worry for you all the time. I don't want you to be alone or feel abandoned. I also enjoy being with you?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't mean we will never see each other. And you don't have to worry about me."

"But you are still young and need guidance and stability."

"I've survived a long time before you came into my life. I'll be okay."

"You won't be. I see you overcompensating at training. You are going to run yourself down. You aren't as independent as you think." I say being brutally honest.

"I'm fine, Cameron." She puts her barriers up.

"Don't do that. I know you aren't. You haven't been in a long time. You don't think I see you detaching yourself from the team and isolating yourself whenever you have the chance. You keep to yourself and are overexerting your body. We have come a long way since your injury-."

"Here we go, again. Yes, I was injured. Yes, I still have seizures. Yes, I am technically disabled. You don't need to remind me of it."

"I'm not trying to. I just want you to be okay." I sigh defeatedly.

"I don't want to argue with you right now. I'm so tired." I see she means it.

She looks exhausted so both of us surrendering from the argument, I ask, "Take a nap with me. We both need it."

I am surprised when she goes under the covers I lifted with no hesitation. I climb in and hold her tight.

"I love you," Madi says closing her eyes.

"I love you too."