insomnia | e.jaeger

16 • since the first time

eren froze, eyes widening as he felt your lips press against his. never did he picture his first kiss with you to be initiated by you. hell, if he was honest with himself, he never thought he would kiss you. it wasn't until he felt your hands trail down his torso and under his shirt that he came back to his senses. he gently pushed you away, watching as your face contorted into an array of emotions. confusion, hurt, but most of all, sadness.

"y/n, you don't want this. just stop." eren said.

"what do you mean? kris and kevin only wanted me for my body. is that not what you want too?" you questioned, your voice cracking at the slight rejection. after coming to the realization that you liked eren, you felt that you owed this to him so having him push you away, hurt.

eren was also hurt that you thought lowly of him. his words came out a bit sharper than what he intended, but he was angry. "what the hell gave you that idea?"

"why else would you constantly be around me? hang out with me? talk to me? there had to be an ulterior motive! annie said that every girl on campus wants you, yet you still stuck around me!" you shouted through tears. your emotions were a mess, your thoughts even messier.

eren sighed, running his hand through his hair before placing his hands on your shoulders. he looked you dead in the eyes, already feeling his face flush before he found the right words to say. "why else? i do all those things because i like you, you idiot! i like being around you, so i constantly want to be with you. i don't just like you for your body because you're so much more than that. you're strong, smart, beautiful inside and out. how can i not like you? and so what if other girls want me? all i want is you!"

you stared at him, eyes wide in disbelief. you never had the feeling that eren would ever like you. you thought maybe he just wanted someone to bother. after hearing his confession, you broke down again but in relief knowing that the feelings were mutual. you wrapped your arms around him as you cried into the crook of his neck. he hugged you back, rubbing your back in a soothing matter. "how long?" you said between sobs.

"how long what?" he asked, feeling you pull back to look at him.

"have you liked me?"

he gave a small, shy chuckle. his cheeks were coated in pink which caused you to smile a little to yourself about as you wiped your tears away. "you're really gonna make me say it, huh?"

you simply nodded, hearing him sigh again. "since the first time i saw you."

"at the ramen shop?" you questioned.

"yes. when we met again at your work, i simply wanted to tease you to get your attention. then i found out about your boyfriend. most of the stuff i said was just a joke, i never expected him to break up with you or anything. i beat myself up for days after and that's when we took you and sash out to the arcade. it was a relief to see you were doing okay."

"you did come off as more of a flirt when we first met." you chuckled, sitting back on the couch. your tears had slowly ceased from falling and now you had a headache rolling in. the exhaustion you felt hit you more than it ever had before. "i guess i should let you know that i like you too."

eren looked over to you, surprised. "really? since when?"

"well, when we first met, i thought you were attractive but of course, i was still with kris. it didn't hit me until tonight that i like you." you admitted, biting your lip. with your head laid back on the couch cushion, you lulled it over to look directly at him.

"you're not just saying that based off of what happened tonight right?" eren asked, feeling a bit insecure.

"no! i thought about everything you had done for me and how you are always there for me. i really do like you eren." you leaned your head on his shoulder, feeling more exhausted than ever.