Polyphia

A S H L E Y

(Weeks later)

Being head of the Student Council and captain of the cheerleading team is an incredible feeling. You are a leader, a role model for young girls. You are an example. But let me tell you a secret. It is stressful as fuck.

No one tells you that you must pull all-nighters several times a week to create plans that include every student in the school, evaluate your other council member's ideas and create routines for the cheer team. I barely see Jack all week, and once we get to the weekend, we argue. Jack continuously tells me that I must quit one of the two things, but I know that I'm not complete with only just one thing. Part of me is in those teams because I am a control freak, the other parts seek validation. Validation that I will never get.

That was always the same train of thought whenever I get ready for school. I would always finish my morning routine by assessing my outfit of the day.

Is my skirt too short?

Is my makeup too much?

Once my examination is done, I open the journal that lies on my night stand and pull out an old picture. A picture of a little girl and her twin brother.

My soulmate. My person.

Ever since my brother died, a part of my parents died along with him. They closed off, coping with my twin brother's death through work overload, late nights at the office and of course, a third party. They want to act as though they are fine, but I know they haven't been able to move on. I don't blame them; I don't know if I haven't either.

I shook my head and picked up my phone to see if Jack had texted me. He hadn't. I try to calm myself down, being rational. Of course, he hasn't texted me, I thought, he's driving; he wouldn't be stupid enough to check his phone whilst he is driving. Yet, I couldn't help but have a weird feeling. Was something off? I mean, sure, we weren't in our honeymoon phase, but, why was I feeling as though there was some distance between us?

I began to fidget with my necklace, a nervous trait that I inherited from my mother. Why was I nervous? What was stressing me out? My stomach rumbled, making me realise that I hadn't eaten anything.

Gosh, I am hungry.

Maybe some toast will fill me up.

My stomach growled again.

Okay, make it two toasts.

As I made my breakfast and munched away, I glanced at my phone to see whether Jack texted me or not.

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Where is he?

The sound of a car horn made me up, nearly dropping my precious toast to the floor. He's here. I grabbed my other toast, rushed upstairs to get my bag, and I was out the door.
Jack was texting as I got in the car.

"Morning," I said with my mouth full.

He was still texting. He didn't even move his head or make a sound.

I watched him as I ate away the second toast.

Why wasn't he answering me?

"Jack?" I call out his name. Jack jumped in his seat and looked up. He turned his phone off and placed it in the cupholder.

"Hey, sorry," he mumbled as he started the car. "The group chat wouldn't stop sending messages."

That's it?

No good morning? A kiss?

What the hell?

"Oh," I said. "What were they talking about?"