A Series of Zutara Stories

Realization: Zuko's Turn

I realized I loved her too late.

I realized it when my feet moved before I realized what I was doing. The searing agony of lightning that overtook my body almost seemed trivial when I fell to the ground, the satisfaction of knowing that I saved her from this pain. In that moment, I felt it was worth whatever I was about to go through. Memories flooded my mind; from the moment we shared in the catacombs, with her hand on my scar to my desperation for her approval when I joined them, watching her confront her mother's killer, recalling the way I wanted to hold her tight as we traveled back on Appa as she sobbed. I remembered the warmth of her embrace as she forgave me and how everything I had done seemed worth it, just to have her in my arms like that. If only I had understood why my eyes lingered as she walked away off the dock. If only I chased after her, I wonder how much things would've changed then, if she would've felt how I felt. Still, I reached out to her, the burning aftermath of Azula's lightning contorting me. Her scream shook through the world, or maybe it was just my world she shook hearing so much pain in her voice. The crackling of fire and blue embers danced through the air as it landed beside me, halting Katara in her tracks.

An onslaught of flames littered the area, as Katara was desperate to try and get to me the roars of the fire mixing with my sister's twisted laughter. I had known she was off, but I never suspected this. Her form had never been as sloppy and as desperate as it was. Azula was always prim and proper, even in fury. But under her thin façade of control that she was so eager to display, there was an uncontrollable rage in her eyes that I had never seen before. She was different, more ruthless, but she was just as calculating as before.

I should've known she would've gone for the person I care for more than myself again after what she did to Uncle in the Earth Kingdom.

I grew tired with each passing moment, my sight quickly fading away. Everything was slowing down as I was coming to grips with the end. All I could hope for at this moment that my body was becoming leaded, was I had given Katara a chance to defeat her and ensure victory. As I closed my eyes letting me succumb to darkness, I heard the sound of ice rapidly freezing accompanied by silence. After what seemed like an eternity, water sloshed down as the two of them coughed and the distant sounds of chains rattled. Footsteps enclosed on me, fading away with each moment, with the last of my strength, I smiled knowing she had won.

That's my girl. I thought before succumbing to the fatigue that was weighing on me.

Pain was sudden as my lungs begged for me to breathe. The ash soiled air tasted bitter as I inhaled, my world slowly becoming clear once again.

I saw her.

Blue eyes so determined and sorrowful as I coughed out and wheezed, breathing becoming a little easier. As her face changed from focused to elated, I knew right then and there, I was going to do everything in my power to keep that smile on her face, forever. I wanted to touch her, I needed her to know how much I loved her. How grateful I was that she literally gave me another chance at life again to show her how I feel.

"Thank you, Katara." Her face was so soft, even through the toils of war and hardship. A choked out laugh burbled from her as she leaned into my hand, her hand on mine. I wanted to stay like this forever.

"I should be the one thanking you." I struggled out a laugh as she delicately pulled me in for a hug, her body slightly wet, shaking like a leaf. With all my strength, I held her close, just wanting to be sure I was here with her again that it was truly her I was holding and not an afterlife I was so desperate to spend with her in it. Slowly she moved from me just to help me up. My legs were weak as I was slowly coming getting used to being alive again. Once I was steady, I decided I wasn't going to waste time, I took her chin forcing her to look at me, as I savored her curious wide eyes before kissing her. Speaking was way too hard right now. My heart skipped as she pulled me closer kissing back, her lips tasting sweeter than I could ever have guessed. As we parted, I looked at her again, pleased to see a soft smile on her lips. I cupped her face again before she readjusted us again, making it easier for me to walk as we approached my sister.

Nothing could've prepared me for the broken scream she made, fire spat at the floor as she roared and tears flooding down her cheeks. We had both known she just had lost everything but I had no idea how much it would hurt the both of us like this. Years of being under Father's judging eye, him pitting the two of us against each other, the pressure of being his ideal child and heir all crumbling with every sob. In that moment, she wasn't the Princess of the Fire Nation, beloved warrior and prodigy, she was my one and only little sister, alone and scared of what was to come.

She was my responsibility now, just like the rest of the Fire Nation would be. Things were going to be different. No more fear, no more agony. My legs wobbled under my weight as I walked towards her, falling to my knees before her stopping her from crying for a moment before I embraced her like Uncle embraced me. As she wailed, desperate to shake off the chains Katara had ensnared her in, I knew I was going to make sure she was going to find her way, just like I did.

~~

Preparation for coronation came so quickly, we all barely had time to celebrate our victory against my father and the end of a long grueling war. The sun was bright, almost like a beacon of hope of for what's to come. The land needed time to recover, we all did but I know we can persevere. A pair of hands startled me as I looked down at her, the sun's rays basking her in light. My own beacon of hope. Nervously I covered up, with my robe, the silks brushing against my skin and the bandages I had. My cheeks began to burn as she smiled up at me, my heart fluttering.

"Are you ready?" She asked. I huffed out a nervous breath.

"As ready as I'll ever be." I knew there was no turning back now, even if I wanted to. My people needed me, the world needed me and I was going to be there for them. A gentle hand was placed on my chest as she stared at my bandages the tips of her fingers lingering on them.

"That was stupid you know." She said locking eyes with mine. "You taking that lightning the way you did. You could've died." Slowly, I took her hand, placing it on my chest letting her feel my pulse, letting her feel me.

"I was in good hands." I closed my hand around hers, the silence between us anything but awkward. I placed my head atop hers as she pulled me close. Her hair smelled of jasmine and was so soft underneath my chin. My other hand dug into the silk of her hair, never wanting to let go.

"You're an idiot." I chuckled at her words knowing what she truly meant. I was her idiot, and I was going to be that as long as she wanted.