The Devil Who Wears My Eyes

29 : The Devil's Offer

Sobrang sakit ng tiyan ko't dibdib nang magising ako. Sobrang naguguluhan ako sa nangyayari kaya naman agad kong prinoseso ang lahat. Mula sa umpisa hanggang sa dulo ay agad kong napagtanto. I killed Tito Jeremy and now I am bleeding to death. Turned out I did not die. Nawalan lang ako ng malay kaya naman kahit nanghihina at natumba nang subukan kong tumayo. Wala akong nagawa kung hindi ang gumapang patungo sa aking maliit na mesa kung saan nakapatong ang telepono na isang pindot lamang ay agad nang matatawagan si Nanay Meera.

She is the only person I can trust. The only person I can call.

"Nanay Meera..." pag-uumpisa ko at umiiyak na. "Tulong po. Mamamatay na ako."

"Ha? Ano, 'nak? Mamamatay? Bakit? Sino? Saan? Susmaryosep."

"Sa bahay po. Sa kwarto. Nandito ako. Tulong."

"Susmaryosep! Anak, sandali lang. Ako'y papunta na! Huwag kang aalis diyan!"

Nabitawan ko na ang telepono matapos iyon at agad nang nahiga sa sahig. Hindi ko na kaya. Sobrang bigat na ng pakiramdam ko at sobrang sakit na ng lahat. Remembering what Tito Jeremy said before I ended his life, it's a bittersweet revenge. Alam kong patay na si Tito Jeremy dahil kinapa ko siya kanina at sobrang lamig na ng kaniyang bangkay. Wala na rin siyang pulso.

The death of my Mama and the reason of my blindness, it was all Tito Jeremy. It makes sense that our life has started to mess up since he got adopted. How he did all of this until now and his fucked-up reasons or whom he did it with, wala na akong pakialam. Hindi pwedeng coincidence lang ang lahat ng ito at ayaw ko nang marinig ang kung ano mang detalye at rason niya. He is fucked up in the head. No one saw it until Mama, and when she knew Mama saw it, he shut her up for good. He is good at manipulating, pretending, and even threatening people to get the things he wants his way. Tito Jeremy is just a demon in human flesh.

"I killed him." I said, chuckling.

Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala. Tuwang-tuwa ako kahit na alam kong makaligtas man ako o hindi sa ngayon ay magkakandaletse-letse pa rin ang buhay ko. I will still be that pathetic blind woman who might be happily chuckling in jail for killing Tito Jeremy.

Muling sumikip ang dibdib ko at agad akong naghabol ng hininga. This might be it. This might be the time I will die, but I was wrong. I felt a pair of lips biting my lower lip. His forehead on my forehead as I hear his heavy breathing.

"Leopold..."

How is this possible?

"You're one little murderer," pag-uumpisa niya at muli akong hinalikan. "I want to reward you for ending that human's life. It's not your lust that drove me mad in here this time. It's your madness and your revengeful heart, Ariella."

Naguguluhan ako. I do not know if I am dead nor just sleeping. I can only see Leopold when I am asleep and once when I was unconscious. So, which one is it now?

"Was it good?"

Sa wakas ay humiwalay na siya sa paghalik sa akin. Doon ko nakita ang tuwang-tuwa niyang pagngiti sa akin kasunod ang pagtingin sa kama kung nasaan nandoon nga nakahandusay pa rin ang bangkay ni Tito Jeremy kahit na nga alam kong hindi siya nakakakita ngayon. He just knows Tito Jeremy is there. Doon ako nakahuma at natauhan. I can see him clearly. He is dead, yet all I can feel is happiness. A pull of some emotion I cannot explain. It is surreal. So damn good.

"Was it...so good like how I pleasure you, Ariella?"

"Exactly..." I said, not even sure if what I agreed on is right. For all I know, it feels like that. "Killing him was satisfying. It made me feel so...happy." sambit ko pa at ni hindi man lang tinatanggal ang pagkakatingin sa bangkay ni Tito Jeremy.

"You borrowed my eyes without my permission again. It makes me think that you are fit to be like me. A demon...whose lust is rooted from revenge. You...can be like me. Do you want to, Ariella?"

Nangunot ang noo ko.

"What do you mean?"

"You die now or later, isa lang ang bagsak mo after taking the justice with your own hands. Hell. And you would not like it there, I tell you, Ariella. But you can enjoy the fires. To suffer in pleasure...and kill lust hungry humans as a punishment."

Hindi ko maintindihan. Napapailing ako ay natatawa habang pinapakinggan siya at pinoproseso ang lahat.

"Ilang oras na ang nakalipas matapos kong patayin si Tito Jeremy?"

"Two hours, Ariella."

"Nanay Meera...she should be here kanina pa." I said, trembling and confused. "By now, the marriage is probably done. Nag-uumpisa na rin dapat ang graduation ni Ranz while I... I am still here bleeding and dying."

Narinig ko ang mahina niyang pagtawa habang tinitingnan ako.

"Situations like this where I am in awe on how complex of a woman you are, I want to pin you on the wall and fuck you real hard, Ariella. You just keep on turning my soulless existence. You...are different."

Nawala ang abilidad kong makakita. Siguro ay dahil kinuha na muli ni Leopold ang mga mata niya habang ako ay naguguluhan pa rin. I then started to feel his hands playfully teasing my neck.

"Leopold..."

"Why?"

"Let me see! Let me borrow your eyes for one more minute. Hindi ko pa natitingnan nang maayos ang bangkay ni Tito Jeremy. Hindi pa ako tapos. Hindi pa ako nasisisyahan.

"I know you always had it in you, Ariella. The passion...the urge."

"Let me see-"

Hindi ko na natapos ang pag-asik ko sa kaniya nang maramdaman ko ang labi niya sa labi ko. Marahas iyon. Animo ba ay uhaw na uhaw sa akin kasunod ang pagtawa niya.

"I will take it slow because you are wounded, but if you want us to pleasure ourselves for eternity, you can always push the red button, Ariella."

"What...do you mean?"

Hindi niya muna ako sinagot bagkus ay muling kinagat ang pang-ibaba kong labi.  Napangiwi pa ako dahil sa sakit ng sensasyon noon idagdag mo pa ang sugat ko sa dibdib at tiyan. It's still a mystery to me that I am not dying. This is all a mystery all along including Leopold himself.

"Do you want to be a demon of lust, Ariella?"