Waves// t.c. and s.m.

1.2

Ocean's P.O.V.-

When the image of my bright blue-eyed twin brother came into view, I instantly felt a mix of emotions. I felt like my emotions were written all over me, because it seemed as if he could see them all. Before I could speak anything from my pale lips, Nash spoke up.

"Look, I know you probably hate me right now...and I understand. Just listen to me Oc." I nodded. He took a deep breath before continuing, "You know that I love you. I only did what I did to protect you. I realize I may have gone a little too far." I scoffed, "okay, I went a lot too far." I nodded in agreement, he sighed, "I know what happened with Jacob really shook you up...he...he broke you..." he sniffed before continuing, "What happened with Shawn was bound to happen," I scoffed again and crossed my arms, "But...I've seen the way that Taylor looks at you. Ocean, he loves you. He really does. I know that what you've gone through. I do." I stood up and cut him off.

"No, Nash, you listen. I have been through so much, you know that. But what you don't know is that what Jacob AND Shawn did not only break me, it changed me. I was pushed around and made fun of while you were gone, living your dream. Believe me, I couldn't be more proud of you. But there are times when I need you, Nash, and you aren't there," I sighed, then continued, "I know you try to help me...I do...but you can't say that you know what I've been through. You don't. You never will. There are things that happened with Jacob that I'll never tell another living soul. Nash, I love you, I really do. I just need to get away from things for awhile. I hope you understand." I stood up and walked inside to Taylor.

"Hey Oc." Taylor says, gesturing for me to sit down. I slowly shake my head, taking in a small breath before I speak.

"Taylor, what I feel for you has definitely grown in a span of a year. The feelings that I have for you haven't changed, but how I feel about myself has changed. I don't want to hurt you, but I feel as if this is the only option." He cuts me off with a single tear falling down his, now pale, cheek. It breaks my heart to see him this way. I still continue.

"What's happened to me in the past is something I haven't even told Nash. I am judged and made fun of back in North Carolina, to say the least. People there don't except me, it's hard. What happened with Shawn and Jacob has hurt me, it's affected me. I feel as if I'm not worthy to be with you, let alone on this Earth. I hate feeling like this. I hate this feeling of not being good enough. Taylor, I really, really love you. You give me unexplainable feelings that I love feeling, but I need a break. It could be for a few weeks, months, or years, I don't know yet. What I do know, is that this will be for the best. Goodbye Taylor." With that, I kissed him lightly, then walked out of the hospital room.

This is for the best. I repeated to myself over and over again, trying to believe it even for just a split second. It didn't work, but I still left.

Just leave already, he's too good for you. I sadly reminded myself.

Nobody

Lonely

Unwanted

Unloved

Unappealing

Unapproved

Nothing

Loser

Delousianal

Stupid

Suicidal Freak

Cutter

All these words played in my head, and before I knew it, I was crying into Shawn.

What has my life become?

*1 year later*

I walked along the beach feeling completely free. It's been a year since I had a break with Taylor. I don't even know where we stand. I haven't talked to him in a couple months. I turned eighteen 6 months ago and immediately moved out to Alabama.

I took college all through high school online. I'm home free till I'm 22 with a nursing degree.

I did this often. I would think about Taylor and how I used to look and act... Now I'm the mystery girl in the neighborhood. I rented a one story from my aunt who moved to Indiana. From the six months of living there, she was pretty lenient. The only rule was I had to let the 'friends lovely son' stay there whenever he decided to move in.

He chose today to move in.

I ran my hands down my long red, blonde, and brown waves. My hair stayed brown at the top till it became blonde five inches down, then went from dark red to rose red to the end.

I had four ear piercings on each ear. One at the top, and three bottom. I also got a wrist tatoo that was a thick outline of a heart with a arrow inside.

I sighed and walked back to the car. Knowing I would have a new roommate waiting for me, I called my brother. He would want to hangout. He supported my decisions of exlressing myself and living. He would understand my not-wanting-to-socialize-right-now attitude.

I pressed call after dialing his number.

"Hey!" Came through the phone. I smiled.

"What's up, little bro?"

"Twelve seconds, Oc. Twelve"

"Still counts."

"Whatever. What's up?" He said.

I pulled up to his apartment he shared with Cam till the end of the summer. Then we were all moving to Cali.

"Sis? Is that your car outside?"

I hummed into the phone and walked into the elevator.

He sighed into the phone and hung up.

I walked through the apartment door to see if Cam was making out with a girl.

Player.

He was.

I screamed.

The blonde pulled away and ran out the door.

I had got a knife from the kitchen.

It added to screaming.

Nash was standing in the hallway doubling over with laughter.

"What the heck?!" Cam said slamming his bedroom door. I grinned. After putting away the knife, I explained my reasoning to being here to Nash.

He pushed me out the door telling me to figure it out and running isn't the answer. I grunted and drove to my house.

I stepped into the house. I stopped immediately seeing who it was. Taylor
f-ing Caniff was in my living room.

What the heck?

《Maddie/Emily wrote this》

A/N Maddie edited this....